Alcohol and Kids: Chemistry

Chemistry

By Anonymous - 31/03/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, while searching for the pungent odor that has been lingering in my son's bedroom, I discovered various types of juice my son has been "storing" to make wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 900

You deserved it 4 581

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Same thing different taste

By StockedWithJuice - 06/07/2013 15:14 - United States - Austin

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 793

You deserved it 5 334

By richkief76 - 10/05/2011 02:34

Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 974

You deserved it 8 324

By Anonymous - 10/01/2010 10:45 - Canada

Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 855

You deserved it 3 881

By don'tdrinkthat - 03/11/2013 22:27 - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 252

You deserved it 4 818

By sadmommy - 23/04/2012 22:51 - United States - Keller

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 542

You deserved it 6 185

By Anonymous - 01/05/2019 04:00

Today, I noticed that my 80-year-old mother has gone through 50+ bottles of my home-made wine. She only moved in with me a month ago. And now I have no wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 206

You deserved it 231

By disgusted - 23/02/2010 18:09 - United States

Today, I went into my parents room to empty their wastebasket. Next to it and around their bed, I found tissues that were soaked in an unknown sticky substance. I had to pick them up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 442

You deserved it 3 683

By notsoproudfather - 01/02/2016 15:54 - India - Pune

Today, I walked in on my son's new habit. Sticking his finger up his ass, farting on it, and smelling it. Apparently, the scent is the purest then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 014

You deserved it 2 304

By wah wah "you raised him" - 22/04/2014 18:59 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 791

You deserved it 5 265

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 22:00

Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 608

You deserved it 380

xoCOURTNIEox 0

Friday 1 April 2011 1:06

wow cool son you got there :)

urdirtyolduncle 15

Friday 1 April 2011 1:05

good man!

Comments

chester75 5

Friday 1 April 2011 4:42

what rule did she break???

scottishandrew1 0

Friday 1 April 2011 5:27

hahahaha, "winning"

samicna 4

Friday 1 April 2011 5:37

find out who he's been hanging around with! that's what inmates call pruno! anycase not good!

hollister122596 0

Friday 1 April 2011 5:44

good job to your kidd!

jetsy1234 0

Friday 1 April 2011 5:53

what FYI stands for?

Autoshot 9

Friday 1 April 2011 6:23

****** Yeast Infection

guestxxx 0

Friday 1 April 2011 7:44

**** Young Inbreds

denvan 0

Friday 1 April 2011 10:24

**** yourself in

MissBunny25 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 0:27

**** Yellow Insects

HeavyMetalViking 0

Friday 1 April 2011 5:53

Add some man juice to his collection and watch him whine.

aback 4

Friday 1 April 2011 5:57

Teach him how to do it right.

stevenmx86 7

Friday 1 April 2011 6:04

Why is storing in quotes? That implies that is just an alias for what he's doing so what's he really doing?

Autoshot 9

Friday 1 April 2011 6:25

Could OP simply be quoting the word the kid said?

stewpididiot 11

Friday 1 April 2011 8:44

I was thinking that Juices should have been in quotes.....

Javie30 0

Friday 1 April 2011 6:32

Molotovs!!!!!!!!!!!!

NCR 0

Friday 1 April 2011 6:33

he's going to own a winery someday... wait .. is this a bad thing?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, an old woman came into my store for help. Towards the end, she asked me my name. I told her while pointing at my name tag. She then replied, "Oh! I didn't notice since I was staring at your boobs. Much prettier to look at." Sadly, this is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 062

You deserved it 214

Today, I told my man that, in order to get me ready for sex within a minute whenever he wants, he only needs to relearn how to go down on me, which he used to do splendidly but has somehow forgotten. He apparently considers this too much effort and will rather keep groping me unsuccessfully. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 82

The Top

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Feeling bad, I texted him a few hours later apologizing. He said it was fine and that he went ahead and picked up a girl from the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 132

You deserved it 48 194

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past 4 months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 577

You deserved it 3 702

Today, while already late for work, a cop pulled me over. When he got to my window, he said, "Oh sorry, I thought I knew you," and sent me on my way. I was relieved, but still got written up for being late to work. My boss didn't believe the story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 013

You deserved it 3 964

Today, I had a UTI and the doctor said the medicine can sometimes make you leak a little. "Leak a little" apparently translates into peeing all over myself, my boyfriend, and his bed while we were sleeping. The doctor also said this medicine can stain your urine a beautiful, bright orange color. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 439

You deserved it 2 984

Today, my fiancé told me that he expects me to agree to quit my job to cook and clean after we get married, or he will not show up at our wedding. He earns minimum wage and my salary is 17 times higher than his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 878

You deserved it 548

Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 84

Chemistry

Same thing different taste

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