Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it was. He just paused, turned to look me in the eye, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my family in which a character said "Fuck you, dad." My dad then slapped me over the head to get my attention and said, "Never talk to your father like that." Okay, dad. FML
Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad singing along to a song on Sesame Street. He tried to divert attention from what I'd just witnessed by angrily grilling me over "just barging in" and not respecting people's privacy. Apparently he forgot that we were in the living room. FML
Today, once again, my family had a loud conversation over the television show I was quietly watching. Ironically, the moment they watch something they like, even if it's a re-run episode, you have to be quiet or you'll be called a monster. Simply say "Hi" and they'll pause the TV to look at you like an annoyance. FML
Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML
Today, whenever my dad says something and I (genuinely) don't hear him, he repeats it in an extremely slow and condescending manner. My family says I should "get a sense of humor" because I'm rightfully pissed about this. FML
Today, I spoiled a TV show I've seen that a friend has started binge-watching by saying, “Episode 7 really did my head in.” His face turned from excitement to annoyance, and has vowed revenge, saying, "Great, I'm going to be anticipating episode 7 for the next few hours thanks to you, stop talking to me." FML
Today, my father is incapable of doing anything without cursing and swearing so loudly that the neighbours hear him. If I ask him what’s wrong or to stop swearing at inanimate objects, he starts yelling at me for "jumping all over him." I can’t win. FML
Today, for the first time in my 20 years of life, I heard my dad unironically say the f-word. I was so shocked by it that I became became practically frozen for a full minute, which is not a very good thing to happen when you're at work, and your boss is watching you. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
broderickc 13
Your dad sounds awesome.
Superstitious 6
Shut up.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (153)
1dvs_bstd 41
Meg, who let you back on the internet?
CorpsmanUp88 21
24/7 could get old fast but its still pretty funny
Aspen_Grace33 27
I like family guy just enough to know its quite annoying. I can't imagine living it in real life as well as watching it on tv. As a side note, my cousin will be marrying next year and her married name will be Megan Griffin. I feel bad for her already!
Aspen_Grace33 27
We've joked about that already, but they have both said no to that name. Although it would be awesome!
CptnHowdyy 13
I don't actually see how this is an FML. My roommates and I often quote Family Guy with one another and it's freakin' sweet.
martin8337 35
Giggity.
Bcfrmkc816 17
I am sorry but I don't actually get to laugh much but this one did it. Sorry OP.
EduJav321 24
Is your name Meg?
bjdog98 9
Genius.
LegolasPrincess 10
Who let Meg back in the house?
lowshadows 21
he said that to you? OH NO! (Bruce)