bad karma
United States
Candy Andy
Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Fatass
Knoxville, United States
Today, I lied to the cashier at my local store, saying that I was "nominated to buy the candy for the party" when in actuality I went home and gorged on it alone. FML
BrokeAndHungry
Ann Arbor, United States
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Timmy
France
Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML
love you too mommy
Brentwood, United States
Today, my mom walked into my room to talk to me. I was surprised because we don't talk much. I was left with a smile on my face after she left, until I realized she'd stolen all the candy on my desk while I wasn't looking. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff
What ARE you doing?
Today, I was so tired at the pet store I was working at that I accidentally offered a kid a dog treat instead of their dog. He ate it. While his mom watched. FML
dannij08
United States
Today, I stole one of my cousin's chocolates. I didn't tell her, after I ate it, I read the box and realized that it was a chocolate laxative. I'm posting this from the bathroom. FML
Anonymous
Bigmouth strikes again
Today, I was pretending to be a mom with my friends, and I was joking how I bought them candy and that it cost me an arm and a leg, only to realize that the cashier only had one arm. FML
sierra
The sleepwalkers are at it again!
Today, my mom told me she’d never forgive me for eating her birthday candy. I ate it in my sleep. FML
ilovekids?
Commack, United States
Today, while I was working at a supermarket, a kid started to cry in line because he couldn't get candy. Since we have free lollipops behind the desk, I gave him one. His mom complained to my manager and said I was grooming her child. FML
nocat6
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Northville, United States
Sneaky
Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML
Top comments
TipOfTheHat 10
It's an expression! Your not actually supposed to do that!
xxcreativedreame 5
Wow. It takes a REAL loser to do that. Seriously.
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Comments (230)
perdix 31
You were rescuing the baby from obesity, diabetes, tooth decay and a lifelong sugar addiction. You're not a thief, you're a ******' superhero. Society ought to be thanking you for taking one for the team;)
rae_munchkin 6
They may have rescued the baby from it while simultaneously adding to their own obesity issue.
perdix 31
That's what I meant by "taking one for the team." The OP selflessly risked the adverse health effects of the candy just to save the baby. I don't know why everyone is so mad at her, she's laying down her life to spare an innocent baby!
Epsilonyx 15
Why are people raging over this? " OMG *** U UR WORTHLESS!!!!!!" It's candy, lol. Calm thy breasts.
Zomg_Okay 27
Excuse me, sir, I think I've found your moral compass. Put it on, maybe you'll see the problem then?
Epsilonyx 15
I don't think my morals are out of line for not thinking that taking a piece of candy from a baby is deserving of all these comments. It's bad, but it's not like he slaughtered the child.
LukaInTheSky 3
I know, right?
sheethapins 13
I hope that kid was sick. Asshole.
ScrapperDoggie 4
You kind of seem like an asshole for wishing that children were sick instead of well.
jennifer42293 4
Give him a break!
karagarren 8
what mom gives a baby candy
monnanon 14
I take it your read baby and thought of a swaddled little 2 month old kiddy, at that age i would be questioning the motives however at 6 months it is perfectly fine as long it is little and not very often and the kid is eating other foods. Take it from a mother who does not have an obese child but does have a child who eats candy sometimes.
cumminside03 0
Depends on the candy really if it was worth it or not
LadyLol_fml 15
how does one get so hungry that they still from an infant?
dogpup4 23
Your username is badkarma - implying that the baby did something to you? Like steal your sweets?
chili10 18
I think she meant that now she has bad karma from stealing from a baby
PassionKyG 0
Now, you eff'd up.
catharsis5 9
You do know that candies would only make you hungrier right?