Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went grocery shopping with my 4-year-old after having some major bathroom issues. As I walked over to get bananas, she yelled out in the middle of the produce section, "DO YOU STILL HAVE DIARRHEA MOMMY?!" FML
Today, I got severe diarrhea in a public bathroom. I told my 6-year-old to stand directly outside the stall where I can see her shoes. She proceeded to inform everyone who came in that "Mommy has diarrhea." FML
Today, I was standing outside a store about to flirt with this guy when my mother drove up and shouted, "Hurry up, I have diarrhea!" FML
Today, my toddler started chirping, "Mommy’s on the toilet!" while I was in a public restroom at our local mall. She also knocked on the stall door to make sure everyone was made aware of our exact location. FML
Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML
Today, my 5 year old-son and I went out for a walk. As I was looking in a shop's window display, I turned around to see my son pooping into an open manhole on the street. FML
Today, while shopping, I suddenly got the terrible urge to use the bathroom. I already had several items and my 5-year-old niece in tow, so I hurried to checkout. I ended up pissing myself. FML
Today, I took my two-year-old out to dinner. During dinner, our son went to the bathroom three times. As we were getting ready to leave he kept saying he had to go potty. He had gone multiple times, so I thought he would be fine. As he stood up, a giant turd fell on the floor in front of everyone. FML
Today, as I was standing in the checkout line in a store, my six year-old daughter proudly announced to everyone that I fell asleep on the toilet last night. FML
Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
yatoast 0
poor kid for having to endure the smell and sound of someone else poo
brookiebaby16 1
at least he's honest
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (305)
ilovemydoodle123 0
ah! 98 wins:)
iron_chefITALY 0
team sleep just admit your a virgin
bberg01 5
tool
yourmurderscenex 13
my question is.... what is wrong with being a virgin?
XxXMetalChicXxX 0
I wanna blow you using diarrhea as lube baby ;-)
6sick6 4
i think I love you, 220..
Murcie 0
Hmm not sure which is a bigger fail... This FML or the comments posted.
yourmurderscenex 13
yeah, i think im gonna have to agree with you.
Schizomaniac 24
Or the fact that you're reading them? Hmm?
lauraxx_fml 0
comments posted for sure haha
jasneetkaur 0
haha oh kids these days.
nerdygirl18 3
That is so embarrassing but hey, what can you do if your kid runs his mouth? :o
kidsanchez1 4
wow next time go with a very good friend and if you have to go let her watch the child
Erindub 0
iron_chefITALY, you are such a douche
musicmaniac925 0
that's what I said :)
oarisimo 4
113 ftw :)
bigboylilz 0
sammiller hit me up cutie :) ha