Love

No, he's just a shitgibbon

By Anonymous - 11/03/2022 22:00 - Czech Republic - Cesky Tesin

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that I’ve been dealing with depression, and apologized for my bad moods. I wrote him three kinda long-story-short messages telling him why. His response? “It’s alright” and continued playing Raft. I expected something more… empathic? Am I selfish? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 394

Love story for the ages

By Anonymous - 11/03/2022 14:00

Today, I found my long-term partner has been liking an OnlyFans account's tweets. I'd be upset, but I think we're still together because neither of us wants to admit defeat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 982

Classy

By EK. - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, in the middle of dinner, I went to rest my chin on my hand, missed, and stuck the straw from my drink straight up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 454

You deserved it 8 034

Carrier pigeon

By Anonymous - 10/03/2022 12:00

Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 94

Unacceptable

By MySisterIsA - 10/03/2022 00:01

Today, my ex-husband and the woman he left me for, also known as my sister, are getting married. On my birthday. My mom is gleefully helping plan the wedding. She seriously sees nothing wrong, and tells me to “stop being a Bitter Betty and be happy for your sister.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 828

You deserved it 128

Wait, what?

By Anonymous - 09/03/2022 22:00

Today, I woke up in a pool of what felt like sweat and tears. Little did I realize, my then-girlfriend had snuck into the house and drenched me in salty water to get me back for kissing her sister. I guess we're even now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 1 865

Don't mess with Texas

By Anonymous - 08/03/2022 11:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my fiancé expressed concern for her mother's health and a desire to be with her in Texas. I called her mother, who is 69 years young and will outlive us all, and it came up that her brother's BFF, who my fiancé has been crushing on since she was a tween, just got divorced and moved back to Texas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 265

You deserved it 102

Master manipulator

By Anonymous - 08/03/2022 16:00

Today, my ex dropped our son off at the same time as I was having my women's support group. I've spent months telling them what a manipulative bastard he is, yet within minutes he had them so enthralled, I somehow became the bitch ex-wife, over-exaggerating about him because I'm bitter, and should "be nicer" to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 154

You deserved it 310

Foreshadowing

By Oliver - 08/03/2022 12:00

Today, I went on a second date with a girl that I like and had a really good time while with her. We got pretty drunk and then went back to mine. When things started to get sexy, I accidentally called her by her sister's name. A girl I don’t even know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 1 011

Marriage of convenience

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my serious boyfriend was talking about how he wants to get engaged and married. I was really happy, until he said he's excited mainly for the tax benefits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 016

You deserved it 4 452

The grass is never actually greener

By Anonymous - 08/03/2022 06:00

Today, I felt a fear that my relationship with my boyfriend isn’t going to last. There’s nothing inherently wrong, yet I find myself thinking of breaking up with him. A lot. I love him and feel like I’m already part of his family, and that's something I don’t want to let go. I don’t know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 358

Grossed out

By vomiting - 07/03/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend took me home to have dinner with his parents. I couldn’t eat a single bite after watching his mom let her three dogs taste all the food off her hands, while she also licked her own fingers while cooking. Later on, he dumped me for being rude and “too high maintenance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 297

You deserved it 153

Pushover

By WhyEven - 06/03/2022 17:00 - United States - Kula

Today, I was seriously angry with my husband and was making valid arguments as to why he was wrong. He just started kissing me, and we ended up having sex. He knows how to win every argument, and I fall for it everytime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 2 237

MY WIFE!

By Fmlloser - 07/03/2022 00:01

Today, I came home from work to find my things outside my yard and the door locks changed. I called my wife to let me in and she told me to go live with, “That homewrecking whore who texted you last night” instead. She’s talking about my cousin, who informed me via text that my aunt’s in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 469

You deserved it 108

RIP in peace

By thanksalot - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I told my girlfriend that my grandma died, expecting to be comforted. She got mad at me for "stealing her thunder" because her cat died two days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 751

You deserved it 4 589

What? How? When?

By Anonymous - 06/03/2022 10:00

Today, I got broken up with by someone I wasn't even dating. They had gone radio silent for two weeks and just popped in to say it was "better to be honest" instead of radio silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 92

Red flag

By Ugly - 06/03/2022 06:00

Today, I went to a wedding with my boyfriend. He became moonstruck with one my friends and said she looked sexy in her dress. The whole night, I was nonexistent to him. He’s now confused as to why I’m giving him the silent treatment. He literally has no clue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 074

You deserved it 355

Scene from a movie

By Mel - 06/03/2022 00:01

Today, I'm crying in an Uber because my significant other just broke up with me. I'm crying quietly but there's no way the driver hasn't noticed at this point. I'm OK with him not saying anything, but he also hasn't changed the music. All that's playing is Pink, and not the loud, girl-power songs, but the sad, slow ones about love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 223

Forever alone

By mstar - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I realized how lonely I am when I got excited over receiving my daily weather update from the Weather Channel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 073

You deserved it 2 909

Low maintenance

By OlCasss - 05/03/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend told me about a girl who he loved a few years ago. He said, "She was extremely beautiful, and I fell for her for a long time. But it's like with universities, everyone wants to study at Harvard but finally ends up in a regular university that they can afford." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 201

You deserved it 124

Weebo

By Anonymous - 04/03/2022 16:00

Today, my mom walked in on me slow dancing to "Bella's Lullaby" with an anime boy cutout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 281

You deserved it 1 071

Gamers CAN have a love life

By Anonymous - 04/03/2022 10:00

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because I was having an affair in The Elder Scrolls Online. While ranting to my online elf husband, he got upset that I had a real life boyfriend and dumped me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 1 884

Sounds like a keeper

By ManChildBF - 03/03/2022 18:00 - United States - Loveland

Today, my boyfriend came home and demanded dinner. I started suggesting things, but he threw out that we should just fend for ourselves. I made pasta and offered him some, but he decided to throw a fit and go to bed at 6:30pm without dinner. He then woke up at 9 to complain he was hungry, then slept on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 220

You deserved it 153

Hungry eyes

By choldcreations - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 474

You deserved it 42 069

Stop using this as an excuse

By Anonymous - 02/03/2022 22:00

Today, I had to tell my ex-husband I’m a lesbian. I’m not, he just keeps trying to win me back, but it worked, he now thinks there’s no chance for us. Unfortunately, he mentioned it to my mom, who “always suspected” and is now obsessively trying to set me up with every lesbian she knows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 1 669

You're so vain, you probably think this FML's about you

By Anonymous - 02/03/2022 04:00

Today, I was told by my wife of 19 years that all the songs about cheating that she's been playing for a year and a half should have been a good enough hint. Getting a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 118

City slicker

By Anonymous - 01/03/2022 22:00

Today, my new boyfriend is such a city boy he couldn’t handle one night of pretend camping in the garden. Apparently, it was too cold, he ran out of Diet Coke, and just generally got bored, so he went back inside to watch TV in bed, but sure, he wants to hike in the mountains with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 210

First impressions

By Anonymous - 01/03/2022 14:00

Today, my dad has such a low opinion of me, he refused to believe I have a girlfriend and instead chose to believe she's a prostitute I hired to try and impress him. My girlfriend was so insulted she dumped me, all while my dad was applauding her for her impressive role play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 717

You deserved it 120

News from the dating scene

By Back to my shell I go - 01/03/2022 04:00 - Australia

Today, I realised that the first guy I've dated in five years has ghosted me. It took a lot for me to agree to go on a couple of dates with him, and I thought they went really well. Apparently not, seeing as it's been over two weeks since he last texted. Self confidence = shattered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 151

No victim blaming

By Anonymous - 28/02/2022 16:00 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, my husband left me for the whore he cheated on me with four years ago, and then, how stupid of me, I forgave him and took him back. I guess I had this coming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 987

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I was fired from my cashier job for "abandoning my post." I saw a man pass out in the 100° heat in front of our store and I rushed to give him water. Not to worry though, my manager assured me he wouldn’t press charges for the water I took from the fridge, but I’m still fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 879

You deserved it 111

Today, I'm so lonely, I wrote my number on a desk at my university, hoping someone would text me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 571

You deserved it 2 083

Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 151

You deserved it 306

Today, my wife of 23 years said she wanted a divorce, that she didn't love me anymore and is moving out. Why? I told her I didn't want us to date and have sex with other people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 215

You deserved it 233

Today, I got a call from my friend who invited me to a theme party. It was a goth theme, and I decided to get real into it. I put on a trench coat, black skin tight pants, and black paint under the eyes. When I got there I was greeted by a kid in a pink popped collar. It wasn't a theme party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 169

You deserved it 7 736

Today, I surprised my girlfriend with rose petals on the bed. Romantic, right? Turns out, the roses I'd bought had been sprayed with some sort of red dye. The petals stained the sheets, my hands, and our white-furred cat, who now looks like a tiny crime scene victim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 101