The Top

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Shy boy

By Anonymous - 20/10/2023 10:30 - Taiwan - New Taipei

Today, I was rejected from a restaurant that I wanted to work in during summer break. I asked the reason why I got rejected and the manager told me that I'm not extroverted enough to communicate with customers. I'd applied for the kitchen job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639

You deserved it 110

Irony stress

By Anonymous - 02/07/2022 06:00

Today, someone stole my Amazon delivery of stress balls from my apartment’s mail room. Now I’m more stressed than before about my stuff getting stolen, and have no stress ball to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 129

I'll get my coat

By Rossi - 17/04/2025 14:00 - United States

Today, the guy I like shared a repost on his Instagram story that said, “No message is a message. Take the hint and move on.” He’d left my last message to him on “Seen” for 4 days now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 179

You deserved it 355

The body keeps the score

By Anonymous - 19/04/2025 18:00 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, the girl I used to be in love with texted me again after 5 months. She wanted to say that she remembers my birthday, which is next month. I hate that my heart still speeds up at the mention of her name, and I know it won't ever stop. She was my first crush since I came out, and my first heartbreak. I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 142

Timing

By king of 8 - 09/05/2021 11:00

Today, on the way to an exam, I got hit by a car. I got back up and limped to class. The teacher wouldn’t let me in because I was 10 seconds late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 169

You deserved it 92

Happy birthday to you

By Anonymous - 22/04/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, it's my 15th birthday. My dad stumbled into my bedroom at six in the morning, completely drunk, and slurred the "Happy Birthday" song. Then he told me to go fuck myself, and said that he wished I was never born. Me too, dad. Me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 64

Unhappy birthday

By gaah! - 09/07/2022 00:00

Today, it's my birthday. My spouse got into a fight, ending a relationship with a friend. They're laying around, unable to move due to panic attacks. I'm exhausted from being dragged unwillingly into things. The birthday messages feel like a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 151

Shit for brains

By Anonymous - 31/10/2023 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 689

Slumming it

By Anonymous - 25/09/2019 12:00 - United Kingdom - Doncaster

Today, my mum and I were moving the last of  my stuff into my new flat when I heard some creaking. The sound was  coming from the bathroom, so I went to check it out. As I stepped  through the door, the floor collapsed and the bathtub and I fell  right through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 929

You deserved it 123

A tad jealous

By Anonymous - 08/05/2025 18:00 - China - Changsha

Today, after my ex dumped me on November 18, 2024, after 11 years of friendship and just 6 months dating, spreading rumors and ruining my reputation, we’re now in the same class again. The worst part? She’s already chasing another motherfucker who looks like her old crush, right in front of me. Disgusting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 390

You deserved it 227

A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do

By Anonymous - 08/08/2022 04:00 - Canada - Garson

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He said it was because he wanted to 'do his own thing'. So gaming 24/7 like he has for the past two years of our relationship, then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 800

You deserved it 219

Pug gets taste of his own medicine!

By FML Approved - 25/10/2017 03:00

The little guy kinda had it coming.

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 170

The old switcheroo

By Anonymous - 21/05/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, I’ve had to get the police involved since I’ve been harassed, stalked, berated, and threatened by the wife of the man I was seeing. It doesn’t matter that I have hundreds of texts, DMs, and his dating profile that says he’s a SINGLE dad whose wife died tragically. She’s still coming after me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 133

Ranting and raving

By Anonymous - 29/05/2021 22:01

Today, my mom sent me a text message, asking me why I blocked her on Facebook. I didn't. She blocked me, after drinking a bottle of wine. After having a conversation telling me that I need to go to AA and detox. I didn't have anything to drink, and have been limiting alcohol. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 109

Spill the shade, throw some tea

By Anonymous - 24/11/2023 18:00 - Kuwait - Mishrif

Today, it's been months since my spouse has talked to me. I'm currently in a timezone that's almost double digits difference. Not even a "Have a good day!" Big ass fuck you I guess. Yet they're always on, then gets off shortly after I'm on Facebook Messenger. Makes sense, right? Shady. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 146

Mean girls

By ToxicFriends - 26/05/2025 20:00 - Germany

Today, a mama from my daughter's class has been talking nicely with me, and we've been friends for the past year, going to the playground and library together regularly. Now, all of a sudden, she has stopped talking or going out with us for no reason. I don't know if my daughter and I are both back in school now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 87

What was I thinking?

By Anonymous - 28/11/2023 10:00 - United States - Okemos

Today, I realized that the only place my missing vibrator can be is at the house of the people I just dogsat for. In their spare room. Which also serves as their kids' playroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 801

Get on with it

By Anonymous - 31/05/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, our manager went on a screaming tantrum because he says none of us wants to work and we make him look bad to the bosses. Yeah, the reason we’re not working is because he forgot to order our steel this week. Can’t do custom welding without the materials, boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 59

Hypochondria

By Anonymous - 30/11/2023 14:00 - Australia - Wacol

Today, my left arm has been aching for three days. My stupid anxiety brain keeps thinking "Heart attack symptom," whereas in reality I know it's because I made multiple trips from the sink to the water cooler with a full kettle of water to fill it up. My arm is aching because I carried a kettle for too long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 184

Rulers of the world

By Anonymous - 10/06/2021 18:01 - Germany

Today, my mom insists on leaving both the front and kitchen door open in case the cat comes home, no matter if it gets cold inside. Yes, the cat is that important. Yes, he also has a cat flap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 98

Stay out of my life

By Anonymous - 16/06/2021 00:01

Today, my mom tried to worm her way back into my life by manipulating my brother into doing the dirty work for her. I pretended to swallow the bullshit and invited her over, just so I could slam the door in her face. My brother says I went too far, like he somehow forgot what a shit mom she was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 910

You deserved it 215

Out of retirement

By Anonymous - 24/08/2022 12:00

Today, within a year of inheriting the family business from me so I could retire, my daughter claimed she had found a way to increase profits that was "way too complicated" for me to understand. Well today, police showed up. Whatever her method was, apparently it counts as fraud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 241

You deserved it 175

Flirtatious mood

By Anonymous - 18/06/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I sent a guy an up-skirt shot, trying to be cute and flirty. He responded with a series of increasingly more mean emojis, including the laughing eyes, the green nausea face, and finally the poop emoji. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 346

Pain in the ass

By Anonymous - 17/06/2021 22:01 - United States - Greenville

Today, I awoke to an excruciating pain in my back from sleeping in the same position all night. I can't wipe my own ass. I've already gone to shit twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 785

You deserved it 133

Dipstick

By Mato Fox - 16/12/2023 20:00 - Slovakia

Today, I was driving through a crossroad on the main road. A driver from the right got road rage, as I didn't let him go first. He drove past me and started brake-checking me. After that he followed me over whole city to scream and curse at me in front of my flat. I didn't break any the laws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 123

Own it!

By Anonymous - 28/06/2021 08:02 - Australia - Kenwick

Today, my ultra-conservative aunt got rip-roaring drunk at a family barbecue and told everyone that I'm a "raging homosexual" with a lack a moral compass, all because I kissed a male friend at a high school party about 20 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 193

Horndog

By Kimberly - 05/09/2022 23:00

Today, my now-ex bf actually gave me the, “If we don’t have trust, we don’t have anything” speech when I caught him commenting “Soooooooo sexy! I’d hit that 24/7/365” on a girl’s photo on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 454

You deserved it 259

One simple trick

By Anonymous - 02/01/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, on holiday with family, it is now abundantly clear to me that being the oldest teenager I was only brought along as free babysitter for 8 cousins, all under 10 years-old, while the adults lounge by the pool, buffet, or hotel bar. I’m exhausted. I want to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 154

Toasted

By Anonymous - 29/06/2021 16:00 - United States - Rockaway Park

Today, I gave a toast at my friend's wedding. When I said, "Everybody raise your glasses," an industrial fan went off and blew my dress over my head. Now, people won't stop talking about how my "blue granny panties" didn't match my dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 008

You deserved it 200

Prank off

By I may also need a Tetanus shot - 08/07/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's sister tried to pull the dog jaw prank on me, accidentally biting my finger in the process. Now she's mad at me because her tooth got chipped when I pulled my hand back, completely disregarding the fact that my finger needed stitches from her bite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 80

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for half an hour. The entire time, a man I had gone on a date with and that had gotten very out of hand with, was sitting in the car next to me. I noticed, panicked, and tried to drive off, rear-ending the car in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 232

You deserved it 30 756

Today, I was walking home from a horrible day at work, when some idiot emptied a trashcan on my head from his apartment balcony. He cried "Oh shit!" and apologized because I wasn't his intended target. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 746

You deserved it 3 734

Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 851

You deserved it 8 206

Today, I watched "Rain Man" with my family. The whole time they kept exclaiming, "Omigod! That's just like Kate!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 260

You deserved it 2 886

Today, I invited my girlfriend over to a family lunch, planning to propose to her at just the right moment. My family was in on it, including my apparently disapproving mom, who kept causing a scene to grab my girlfriend's attention every time I went to pull out the ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 882

You deserved it 2 821

Today, I was rear-ended while at a stop sign, by my driving instructor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 683

You deserved it 2 815