Today, I dolled myself up and hit the campus gym, hoping to leave with a cute boy's number. I left in a stretcher. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Do you even lift, bro?
Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, I was at the school's rec center, working out for the first time in a while. While there, there was this very mysteriously attractive girl who kept shooting me glances. I asked for her number and she responded by saying "if you can lift this same weight as me". I couldn't. FML
Today, a cute guy asked for my phone number and I gladly gave it to him. I was feeling really good about myself for getting hit on by the star football player. That was until he called 8 times and left 5 messages. In 2 hours. FML
Today, I hit the gym. With my car. FML
What's wrong with me?
Today, I went to the gym. This really fat and gross guy got on the machine next to men and I figured he'd hit on me but he didn't even look at me the whole class. Now my self-esteem is in the gutter. FML
Please stop
Today, I was at the gym and I saw a really cute guy working out nearby. I tried to get his attention by taking off my shirt and smiling at him. When he walked over to me, instead of asking for my number, he just said "Can you please put that back on? Thanks". FML
Rain check?
Today, my family was going to have lunch with my parents' friends, who have a kid my age who is very similar to me, and is really cute. I wanted their number to see if it could turn into something beyond friendship, so I dressed up cute and did extra flawless makeup. All for the lunch to be canceled. FML
Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. I pulled a muscle taking my sweater off in the locker room. FML
Today, I was trying to look cute in front of this really nice guy. I sure hope he thinks smacking into a pole, rebounding backwards and knocking over an old man is cute. FML
Top comments
BeccaHugs 17
Get a cute doctors number instead.
5t3ff1k4h 45
Cute boys don't usually go to the gym. And if I were you I'd be looking for a handsome man's number. Cute boys only come in one age: twelve.
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Comments (192)
BeccaHugs 17
Get a cute doctors number instead.
GoW_Chick 15
Meh, I say go for the cute grease monkey mechanic's number, but that's just my personal preference.
TheDrifter 24
Nah, cute paramedic. He's already got her in a bed anyhow.
Michaelsgirl04 9
Technically the doctor would get into some serious trouble for having anything but a professional attitude with a patient
Ronnie_loves_you 11
Did she fall and break her leg on a treadmill or something? I really wanna know how she ended up in the hospital.
jplonski 1
Going to the gym to meet guys is actually pretty pathetic
skullcandifiedDJ 5
Don't stare at men's ass all day while working out at the gym, you might hurt yourself... Think it's a little too late for that now
n_epic_fail 14
OP's got a better chance at showing up at school playing the sympathy card. What doctor is going to flirt with (let alone give his number to) a patient in that awful hospital attire?.. . Where is DocBasterd when you need him!
Azula272 14
She needs Dr. Cox ;p
GovernorGeneral 8
^And you need the rapist.
GovernorGeneral 8
Oh i apologize. I meant a therapist. Autocorrect...
flux_panic 18
33, party pooper.
GovernorGeneral 8
Oh and 76- i hate azula....shes such a bitch. ZUKO FTW
badmike89 6
14 gow chick you can have my number
lyndylove 1
Hahahahahahahaha!
at_1sexymofo 3
Its just a joke -_-
juicystar777 4
there are so many things wrong here! why in the world would you wear make up to the gym? the whole point is to sweat so you can lose weight, and when you're wearing foundation, i'm sure that's not what you wanna do. you're wasting a tube of foundation and primer that could seriously be used during the weekend. -__-
tiggerbaxon 2
^ like totally :/
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
Seeing how OP enjoys getting dolled up then excercising, I think she would make a great hooker.
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
This is what happened: OP found a cute boy, they started talking and he told her to meet him in the changing room, OP thought she was gonna get it in,she did get stabbed, but instead of a dick, it was a knife. The "cute boy" turned out to be a girl named Justin Beiber, why did she stab OP? Because OP found out "his" secret, in a attempt to save her reputation, Justin Bieber attacked, fortunately, OP survived and now the world knows, the only ones that appear to not have found out are the pre teen girls that are in denial and deny the facts.
Vash_41288 10
I go to the gym 4 times a week and I always wondered why girls wear make up to work out guess those are the ones going to pick up guys only... Jeez who would of thought that, isn't that what clubs/bars are for? It's funny to sometimes see the make up all runny too silly women
ManWhatsoever 6
That why I don't like going to the campus's gym anymore, a lot of distractions. Girls with yoga pants nice ass etc. I can't focus on working out. I'm a man I can't help it
GracesDelirium 9
Gabby! It's you!
yummy_richkid 3
Ha. You dolled yourself up to go to the gym? *****.
borkchop1992 15
Jiggaty check yo' self before you wreck yo' self
SoSickWithIt 14
Cause shotgun shells are bad for your health.
kdawg360 0
English translation: You should be careful on those treadmills or you could be met with serious injury.
jonriise18 3
And dicks in yo ass is bad fo yo health!
j_cat187 20
Aww I like 54's
Jiplo 18
I hate 54's comment! That's awful!
juicystar777 4
^ omg are you like a homophobic? there is nothing wrong with being gay! one of my best friends is gay! don't judge people! having butt sex isn't wrong because thats how some people need to do it. D~:
silentbutfunny 0
129... Maybe its cause he think it puts him in good health?? I dont think he's bashing anybody...
AceArctic 4
129 - Chill your lady balls.
KeyboardWarrior 10
129 Really makes me laugh. She overreacts to everything! I personally find her comments hilarious.
5t3ff1k4h 45
Cute boys don't usually go to the gym. And if I were you I'd be looking for a handsome man's number. Cute boys only come in one age: twelve.
blegehlehgleh 0
Justin Beiber is NOT cute!
AmbrosiaWriter 17
Justin Bieber is also not a boy. =P
SoSickWithIt 14
4 has spoken.
lonely_heart_89 6
Who says cute guys usually don't go to the gym? I'm at the gym almost every day, & trust me, there are A LOT of cute guys there!
jerryk 2
I got to the gym but I would rather call myself hot or handsome
GoW_Chick 15
There's a difference between cute guys and handsome guys, cute guys you date, handsome guys you marry, think about it.
43trauts 14
Since when did she say she was referring to Justin Beiber
AnagenisisZagus 13
^It's implied my beautiful little troll. :)
KiddNYC1O 22
So basically cute guys you **** and handsome ones you bring home to daddy? Got it.
shanemaximo 7
Cute guys go to the gym and have better bodies, but handsome guys have bigger dicks so chicks date one, marry the other.
Awesomehobo44 3
Hey, I'm pretty sure that was meant to be an insult, #4 and quite frankly, being of twelve years of age, I do not really appreciate it. Honestly, just because people/kids like me are just younger and appear to be of less intelligence, I think quite a few of you are greatly mistaken, considering the level of maturity I've seen in older teens and young adults. Basically, the point I'm getting across here is that some people, example #4, don't need to act like assholes to the lower generation. No I'm kidding ignore that entire message. But I think I speak for all 12-14 year old guys here; we all hate being called "cute" by some older for their own amusement or the attempt at being friendly. :)
Awesomehobo44 3
And who says one my age can't get a girl's number? :D
Jenchixo 1
Thats because he not 12 !
43trauts 14
79 - troll? how the hell am I being a troll?
salmonodin 9
It's not that you were being insulted because of your age, #4 was just trying to say that cute isn't really a term that should be used to describe an attractive man at a gym. You see, an adult wouldn't call a 12 year old attractive, so the word cute is often used to describe children (sorry, but until you're 18 and "legal" you are considered a child in the government's eyes.)
Hollandiscrazy 12
12 year olds + relationships = FAIL
Awesomehobo44 3
All right I'm going to reply to two comments here... Yes, I know that one my age is legally a child that much I do know. And 142, seriously, kids my age dont HAVE relationships. Because I agree, a real relationship at my age would be pretty stupid.
Awesomehobo44 3
Sorry *143
5t3ff1k4h 45
140 hit the nail on the head. Dear 12 year old kid, get your panties out of a bunch.
Awesomehobo44 3
I'm sorry, did you read my message correctly? You know, the part that said "ignore that entire message". And also I see that you used the cliched "get your panties out of a knot". original. ******* original.
5t3ff1k4h 45
183 - My original comment was not meant to be taken as an insult to children your age. I guess you're not mature enough to realize this, therefore you misinterpreted and took it to heart. Not my fault or my problem, bub. Everyone else seemed to get it.
Awesomehobo44 3
Obviously, you read my first comment completely incorrectly. You know, the part that said "ignore that entire message"? Yeah. Think before you speak. Or just learn to read.
Awesomehobo44 3
See how I'm repeating myself? It's because you DON'T GET IT. Yes, I completely understand that your original comment was just meant to be a joke. Mine was too. Read carefully.
Awesomehobo44 3
Honestly. This is exactly what I mean. Adults look at kids as completely inferior, when they're the ones who make all the stupid mistakes.
ginglederf 6
I think you tried way to hard to speak fancy in that sentence....
natsaysheyyy 16
So how are they supposed to be attractive if they don't work out? Only ugly people DON'T go to the gym.
marigoldcobain 21
"**** you if you have a taste in guys who make you happy! Date guys who make your pussy wet instead!" Yeah, **** you.
pagullarka 9
As they say try try again:)
crazychick1269 7
Oh... I thought only my 3 year old sister says "try try again" when she falls of her tricycle
AnagenisisZagus 13
....Guess not, huh? Just great knowing now, eh?
magicdragon5 2
Canadian, eh?
Guren 0
how the hell do you fall off a tricycle?
Omegadolly 22
Were you trying to run in heels? D:
LadyGore 12
Win. Lol
micahsmommy 13
It made her bum look good. Who knew it would be so difficult?
lolmigosh 15
And how did that happen???
crazychick1269 7
She tried riding her bike on the treadmill. Double the work out
thisiscat 14
Maybe she literally "Hit" the gym..
TheFamilyElf 17
I bet you got their attention, though! Mission accomplished! Well... Not really... Close enough.
dani05 0
Hmm... Am I the only wondering how this happened? But you should heal up and try again! Hope everything's ok
DJ_YDI 4
What if OP was a dude and went to the gym to pick up guys, got his ass kicked and had to leave on a stretcher.... Lmao
GoW_Chick 15
This is why you need a wing woman to help you out. Now I'm still wondering were you hitting on the wrong guy with a crazy girlfriend, or did you try to impress them and didn't know your own limitations?
MrSassypants 34
Her own limitations I suppose because the OP most likely would have mentioned a crazy girlfriend attacking her to make it seem like a worse FML.