Today, while at a boring lecture, I heard some people behind me whispering and laughing. I turned around, wondering what was so funny, which made them laugh even more. I then realised it looked like I'd been giving my pen a blowjob for the last 10 minutes. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, in one of the corridors at university, I was pretending to have passionate sex with one of my lecturers to make my mates laugh. She happened to walk by just at that moment. She reminded me when my next exam is; she will be marking me. FML
Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML
Today, I was sitting in class when I overheard a group talking about how much they don't like me. When they saw me there, they burst out laughing. FML
Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML
Today, I fell asleep in a lecture. I laughed at something amusing in Dreamworld, but the laugh came out as a prolonged creepy groan in Lectureworld. I woke up to see everyone within a 5 meter radius staring at me. FML
Today, I was in music class and I was reaching for the pen I'd dropped, I tilted myself, gripping my left hand on the table, and the person beside me pulled my arm for some reason, and my face fell into their lap. Right on the crotch. It reeked of sweat. FML
Today, I was having a mass lecture, for 3 classes combined, all microphones muted. I wanted to go to the toilet, so I connected my headphones, and I did my job massively while listening to the teacher. Suddenly, the teacher said, "Oh, close your mic for the love of god." 85 students heard me taking a shit. FML
Today, I was listening to music with headphones in my usually quiet class. At one point I really got into the song so I just quietly sang along because why not. Turns out by the end of the song I was singing at full volume, almost yelling, and my friend stopped me to say that. The entire back row was laughing. FML
Today, while walking across campus, I stopped to look at my reflection in a window. I straightened my bra straps and then turned to the side to dig a wedgie out. It wasn't until I heard peals of laughter that I realized I couldn't see IN the classroom, but they could see OUT. FML
Today, I was bitching to my mom on the phone about the long, boring paper assignment my Lit professor gave us. Right after saying, "That woman needs to get laid" I heard laughter behind me. I turned around. Hello professor, just on my way to drop the course. FML
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Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Now your pen-is very happy! ;D
howslife123 0
they were turned on and you know it
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Comments (242)
iamchampion123 0
Shawg! shouldn't be suckin on that pen
hannah1203 2
Don't lie, that's the most action you've probably gotten in the last 6 months.
lionheart822 13
ahahahahahaha I love your pic. XDDDDDD
L3Paparazzo 7
practice makes perfect :P
IndianRapper 0
aww man i see it:P
BballHottie34 9
you know it
RiskiBusiness 1
and here cums the ink...
RiskiBusiness 1
and here cums the ink...
angelica169 0
lol
BballHottie34 9
my bottom right corner says add
trick619 0
haha 63. I bet op tried to break it so it would eventually explode while sucking on it haha
mydgmax 0
wow same incident thathappened to me :/
natvv 0
I got the impression that OP was just hunched over and moving as he wrote. Since they were behind him, it looked like he was giving his pen a bj.
effstephslife 0
Thats the impression I got
RiskiBusiness 1
and here cums the ink...
Klums02 0
it's even worse that his name is gayboii...
Alekyork 0
Lol, we'll see that on youtube shortly.
pinkcd3 0
hhahha tru daht
jess6blondie9 3
Ew. There are so many germs on pens, why would you suck on that? v
lionheart822 13
maybe there were less germs on his pen than his thumb. 0_0
jess6blondie9 3
Maybe.... You never know where that thumb has been...
lionheart822 13
especially when you're in a boring class =P
jess6blondie9 3
Hmm. I don't want to know what you do during a boring class then! :O haha.
lionheart822 13
haha my history teacher back when I was a senior, commented that it was easy to tell if a guy was texting in class cause if he saw someone with their hands under their desk, they were either texting or doing a little something else. lol
jess6blondie9 3
Haha oh gosh... Let's hope they were texting. xD
misa08 0
i hope so too lol
jess6blondie9 3
Haha no I haven't seen that.!
jess6blondie9 3
Haha, okay. What's it called?
tulsafml 0
haha. maybe op can learn something from that kid
jess6blondie9 3
You'd be amazed at the things kids do in school. :O
lionheart822 13
actually there was this kid in my high school that got caught masturbating in class, not once but twice! the second time was in study hall and the chick next to him was screaming her brains out. XD
LOLbomb 1
A boy at my school has a hole in his hoodie pocket. He claims that he uses it to ********** in class. My inference? He's too lazy to get it sewn. :l
xdannyx117x 0
two lesbos got caught in my senior year , good times , good times
jess6blondie9 3
At my school, people get caught having sex in the back stair case.
jess6blondie9 3
I don't know why they don't just wait until after school. We have open campus, they can leave anytime that they want as long as they check out. People aren't too smart.
josephhhhhh 0
in my school they caught students having an orgy that was going on in the locker room. while the coach was watching. and then teachers join and we all had one happy gang bang teachers and students joined well pretty much everything that walks. fun times ;((((
jess6blondie9 3
Haha, even the teachers joined? It might sounded more believable if you wouldn't have said that :) lol
SuperNova69 0
sometimes it happens
Tempsey 0
This is the Ultimate Orgy...(I don't know the rest of the song)
abarragan11 0
at my school they caught a couple having sex in the dug out of the baseball field lol
anorexicbarbie 8
Just message eachother, for ***** sake! There's a reason it's there!
lionheart822 13
at my school, two band geeks were caught having sex in the band room during band class. one of them was in my homeroom and told me it was worth the suspension lol. also another kid was caught taking a piss in a urinal while sitting in a chair 4th away(that's right he shot piss out like a water gun).
certified_camel 0
dude these two kids had sex on the bathroom and the guy actually got the girl pregnant lol.
maciann9 0
chilll outt ,
vihan 0
Poole give BJs in the bathroom all the time
superflyman 0
u would know
fightingkittens 39
My friend told me that when he was in second grade at a shitty public school, the seven-year-olds would ********** under the desks. And recently, a couple 12-year-olds got busted for having sex at school.
omgo_fml 0
That's what she said
howslife123 0
they were turned on and you know it
jess6blondie9 3
Yeah! You suck that pen good OP;)
Aerious 0
It could've just been a pen in their pants, maybe like the one OP was sucking on.
lionheart822 13
umm is your reply off? I'm not sure what you meant.
mendozaale 0
to be honest here i would be turned on ... :)
mendozaale 0
but then if its a guy ... i wouldnt be turned on...
jess6blondie9 3
Haha
tulsafml 0
damn. okay. my turn to be grammar Nazi now!
tulsafml 0
Start off sentences with capitals. Doea. what the f is doea? suking sounds like puking mixed with snorting. U! U! U! U! U!
lionheart822 13
You spelled "sucking" wrong. I'm sorry but you sir are a Nazi failure, which sounds better than it is. lol
nikkilynne 0
^ Win
ohSNAPyall 27
181, it wasn't a misspelling. 179 is only a bad Grammar Nazi for not putting it in quotes.
ImKindaABigDeal 6
"Grammar Nazis" are bad by definition.
tulsafml 0
That man said, in a quote, "suking", and not sucking. Thus, I have a reason for saying what I did. Sucker. Lol. Haha. I am not a grammar Nazi. lol.
illmatic2 16
You're obviously gay. You just don't know it yet. Congratulations.
RyanMacVey 17
**** you
kingtz 6
I was thinking the same thing.
caveman127 0
his name is gayboii...yeah I think he is gay
jess6blondie9 3
Why does it matter if he is gay? That's none of your concern.
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
illmatic2 16
Nobody said it does matter.
justalilrandom2 4
I'm a little confused, why was a 14 year old at a lecture? I'm assuming it is the gayboii who comments though.
Husker7424 2
Illmatic, check his user name again, he knows.
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
mitchem 3
^^agreed
filipino_dude 0
wtf ?
RyanMacVey 17
I think this is my post... its like exactly what I typed :o
lionheart822 13
yeah, on your profile it says "1 fml confirmed out of 2"
jess6blondie9 3
Woo!
RyanMacVey 17
so this is mine??? well this is embarassing :S
RyanMacVey 17
im not gay :I
RyanMacVey 17
its fine
rompgr 0
ha!
TayonaC 10
aww man well that sucks... haha ou didn't even know this was yours it's like "aww man this guys such a loser! what's his nam... o crap thats my post!"
RyanMacVey 17
ahaha I didnt even notice at first
kennababy 0
haha oh good job ;) you couldn't even remember which one was yours ;) haha it's okay :) I would probably do that to lol
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
Why would you make your screen name "gayboii" if you're not gay?! What the he'll...
RyanMacVey 17
to piss off people like you ofcourse
krystal2424 0
that's just not sanitary. lol
persianjr1 7
and sucking a dick is?
fluorescentadole_fml 8
excellent point, beautiful swimmer man
maa_rico 4
shouldn't you know?
franniedottp 8
lmfao at 98 and 99!!!
emily14swim 0
hahaha he does have a point:)
shaysters1432 0
nxt time dnt suck on ur pen...its not there fault it was funny
xxZombieCookiexx 0
Bang I just shot a duck. :P
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Now your pen-is very happy! ;D
lolwutdino 9
I see what you did there. ;O
tulsafml 0
lol just what I was thinking
realfigueroa 1
that comment wasn't very troll of you