Today, my neighbor had a word with me for being "loud in the bedroom" last night. I haven't had any action for two years now, but I was too happy that she thought I'd got lucky to tell her the truth. So what was I really doing last night? Trying to sing like Christina Aguilera. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML
Today, we live in a terraced house with very thin walls. For no reason, I sang "Una paloma blanca, I have a huge hairy cock" loudly in the bathroom. I walked down the garden path and encountered my neighbour, who laughed and sang "Una paloma blanca" whilst nodding knowingly. FML
Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML
Today, there was a knock on my apartment door. It was the man from next-door, who sarcastically asked if I was alright, because he said he heard me screaming in agony. I was singing. FML
Today, I was singing in the shower, not realising the window was open. When I got out, the neighbours were at the front door, loudly arguing with my mother. They were complaining about my awful singing. FML
Today, I was singing in the shower and my neighbor called the police because they thought I was in trouble. FML
Today, I bumped into my next door neighbor. She said, "Not for nothing, but I heard you fighting with your boyfriend last night, you're pretty harsh on him." I don't have a boyfriend, I was just drunk and castigating myself. FML
Today, I was singing in my dorm. When I left a little later, a cute guy came up to me and asked if I was the girl who'd been singing. I proudly said yes. He replied, "Good thing you finally shut the fuck up!" and walked away. FML
Today, I was alone in the kitchen doing the dishes, and I started singing along to my favorite song when it came on my playlist. However, unbeknownst to me, my neighbors were having a barbecue next door, and they cheered and applauded when I'd finished. I’m never singing again. FML
Today, I was belting out Beyoncé in the shower, really feeling myself. When I got out, I heard applause. My new neighbors were sitting on their balcony and I had my bedroom window open. They'd been unwilling members of my entire shower performance's audience, and the applause was definitely sarcastic. FML
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Top comments
Naule 11
Id say you nailed it then.
iLike2Teabag 27
Just don't try it while you're driving. You might pass out and hit someone...
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Comments (34)
worldclassrager 39
Keep trying you'll get it...maybe singing in the shower will make it more hidden...
psycheiris13 20
Don't let them get you down OP! Sing as loud as you want ;)
RANDALL4801 11
well atleast ur neighbors thought u were good enough to have been doing it with somebody lol
dakid87 10
Hitting them high notes huh?
icepick23 12
2 years? Just pay for it, geez...
josefineshield 11
This is probably my favorite FML.
HighasaCloud 46
What kind of a miserable, pathetic excuse of a person gives someone crap for loud sex? Unless it is over-the-top fake and a multiple-times-a-day thing, I never cockblock because I wouldn't want anyone cockblocking me.