Today, a guy asked for my number at a party. As I was entering my number into his phone, my name and a picture of me popped up. I'm afraid I just met my stalker. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to online for weeks. When I showed up, he looked nothing like his profile picture, and he spent the entire time talking about his ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, the guy I was seeing texted me a photo back of myself I had sent him earlier, saying I'm such a beautiful woman, suggesting that I set it as my profile pic. Too bad he doesn't think I'm pretty enough without a lot of enhancements, because he photoshopped the hell out of that thing. FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
Today, I was walking back home from a party, when I received an email from our neighborhood watch. It said to beware, because a "thug-like" stranger with a white shirt and brown hair had entered the neighborhood. My hair is indeed brown and I was wearing a white shirt. FML
Today, thirty minutes after the end of a great date with a great girl, she texted me, "Yeah, uh, never come near me again." FML
Today, I finally got a date with one of the hottest girls in school, a perfect 10. Just before I go to pick her up to go to the movies, I called her to find out where she lives. She answered the phone, only to hear my father yelling in the background, "STOP TALKING TO THAT WHORE." FML
Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML
Today, my friends and I went out drinking, and luckily enough, the guy I have had a crush on for four years now was there. I tried to get drunk so that I can make a move and blame it on the alcohol. I went in to whisper my confession in his ear... only to puke on him. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the crack in the door. I quickly looked away, but about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML
Today, I googled myself in preparation for my upcoming job interview. Turns out there's a girl on Twitter with my name and age who tweets nonstop about getting wasted and being on probation. She won't make her profile private. FML
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Top comments
aFieryFairytale 2
1-800-Restraining-Order. FYL, indeed.
theneatoburrito 8
You should've just changed all of your information in his phone, and changed your number to a sex hotline. That would freak him out a bit. But FYL, OP.
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Comments (127)
Vizaon 0
My phone puts Facebook friends as contacts, but you can turn it off. Maybe he was just friends on Facebook with you?
kaspike123 0
You should type in : 1 800 get away !
mollymayan 3
LMAO, creepy. Delete your contact from his phone and run like hell girl.
jarmezzz 2
Android phones link in to facebook and update photos and details automatically. Congratulations on being forever alone.
greenlime_fml 3
That's when you delete your number from his phone while you still have it in your possession
I_am_original 1
Well hello welcome to the modern age where smart phones automatically save contacts and pictures from facebook. Get over yourself you arent being stalked.
FirebirdF350 7
Well if it was an android and yall were friends on facebook or he had auto sync like I do, when friends or anyone types in their number it immediately downloads available information to my phone, and if the person isnt my friend, automatically sends a request to the account. Technology makes creepy things happen, but doesn't make him a stalker
ecascio2010 9
How did he not recognize you?
dani3l8 0
Lol
elizabeth713 8
If he is your friend on Facebook that might happen without him being a stalker