Intimacy: We need a break

We need a break

By pst - 21/11/2010 01:06 - South Africa

Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 682

You deserved it 59 228

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

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Same thing different taste

I'm innocent!

By Anonymous - 06/06/2022 04:00

Today, I got a text from an old hook up. I assumed it was a mistake, since we hadn’t spoken in years. She replied that her fiancé just dumped her after finding our old chat log. The last message was 10 years ago, and apparently she has become a prude since then, so now I’m a homewrecker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 456

You deserved it 133

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 14:31 - United States - Iowa Park

Today, I got mugged by a fake hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 728

You deserved it 8 301

By Bigfatfailure - 28/03/2013 10:02 - United States - Garden Grove

Today, I got dumped during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 499

You deserved it 9 848

By Anonymous - 22/08/2011 19:35 - United States

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 615

You deserved it 46 749

It's for the best

By yesguysgetabusedtoo - 24/05/2013 23:42 - New Zealand - Papamoa

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 612

You deserved it 6 946

Complicated relationship

By Anonymous - 02/11/2019 23:00

Today my girlfriend of three years broke up with me. Why? She wasn’t sure about the relationship anymore. She seemed pretty sure though, seeing she was on Tinder less than 2 hours after, thanks to the 3 different friends that all called me about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 028

You deserved it 174

By Anonymous - 08/05/2009 11:37 - United States

Today, I texted a girl who I had hooked up with the night before to see if she wanted to hang out again. She responded, "I think we should keep it the way it was, before last night." I just met her last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 799

You deserved it 13 778

By prostitutes boyfriend - 21/10/2011 14:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 380

You deserved it 4 391

By brokenatthebar - 24/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Carleton

Today, I was dumped via text halfway through my 8-hour bar shift. I had to deal with my co-workers and customers asking me how my vacation with my now-ex was for the next 4 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 767

You deserved it 315

Sex work is real work

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 00:01

Today, I just found out my best friend is a hooker. I just thought she worked nights and had terrible taste in clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 845

You deserved it 486

SleepingSkulls 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 9:21

This is probably the saddest thing I've ever read.

imsosleepy 9

Sunday 21 November 2010 10:44

A hooker? Did you honesty expect a Disney-styled happily ever ending?

Comments

kcTornado 0

Monday 22 November 2010 13:02

OP lives in Africa, why the **** do people still sleep with hookers when the risk for AIDS is so high?? epic fail ydi though

princesspixie 0

Monday 22 November 2010 17:17

wow how lame and sucky are you

CurtisDkidd 0

Monday 22 November 2010 18:37

its probably becasue youve been seeing the same hooker for a year. you aint dating. you even have your hookers number? wtf

Inker96 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 1:02

as soon as I saw 'the hooker' I was like WTF?

jacobey 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 3:25

a hooker rly? is she even hot?!?!?!

Tylerhines1995 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 3:31

you sick ****

J0gby 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 6:00

so this is how you get dumped in africa

dlb13 3

Tuesday 23 November 2010 6:06

ur an idiot man... hooker really?

xgetxbentx 13

Tuesday 23 November 2010 7:39

ydi for ******* a hooker. that's disgusting and rather pathetic.

cathyran25 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 7:42

lol u have 2 buy a hooker

Keywords

Work Geek Management Health Periods Love Relationship advice Dating Sexism Anxiety Relatable Embarrassing Restaurants Birthday Shopping Clothes Miscellaneous Cleaning Haircut Awkward Family Mental health Neighbours Weird Doctor Parenting Kids Christmas My ex Instagram

The Top

Today, it's the third night in a row that I have had a sexual dream involving another woman. I'm married and when I tried talking to my husband about pleasing me better, he told me he doesn't want to go down on me because it makes him nervous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 565

You deserved it 367

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my son's third grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my fifth story window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 732

You deserved it 15 829

The Top

Today, I went to a wine tasting for the first time. I copied the experienced people around me by swishing the wine around in my mouth, which I then choked on and spit out all over my white blouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 937

You deserved it 10 124

Today, I was teaching a new student their first ever piano lesson, hoping that they would sign up for more lessons. Thirty minutes had gone by and after the 5th time of me saying what a talented, sweet little girl she was, the mother told me it was in fact a boy. They didn't sign up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 887

You deserved it 3 080

Today, I wanted to do something nice for my mom. So, while she was sleeping, I cleaned the whole house for her and even made her breakfast. A few minutes later, she came downstairs and yelled at me to keep it down because she was trying to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 880

You deserved it 293

Today, after months of living on five dollars a day for food in college, I found out my parents bought me an expensive meal plan and forgot to mention it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 524

You deserved it 1 498

Today, one of the comic companies I submitted to, replied back. They said that the story was boring, and the main character bland, generic, uncultured, had no potential for personal growth, a suburbanite, and an ignorant shut-in. I based the personality of the main character on my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 252

You deserved it 12 820

Today, I'm spending $1,400 on rent each month to hear my upstairs neighbor walk from one end of their apartment to the other, and then back again. This occurs pretty much all day and all night. Yesterday I woke up at 3:30 a.m. from the banging of steps. My other neighbor played his music so loud, I felt it through the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 455

You deserved it 153