Today, knowing that I have been in a lot of stress lately, my friend tried to teach me how to meditate. Eventually, I ended up in a deeply relaxed state in which my mind was completely clear. When I snapped out of it, I realized I'd pissed myself. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML
Today, as suggested by the my therapist, I tried practicing mindfulness meditation while on a break at work to reduce stress. Midway through my deep breaths, I accidentally let out a loud and unexpected snore. My coworkers now think I've taken my relaxation techniques to a whole new level. FML
Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, during a very stressful and busy day at work, I took a bathroom break. Unfortunately, of all the things on my mind, taking down my pants before emptying my bladder wasn't one of them. FML
Today, I was riding the train and fell asleep. A friend of mine got on a few stops later, and to be funny, shouted 'BOO!'. I woke up and was so startled I peed myself. FML
Today, my friend peed her pants while we were sledding. I could feel it trickling down into my pants. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, my best friend decided she wanted to tell my boyfriend about the time I pissed myself laughing at her house. When she was telling the story I ended up laughing so hard, that I pissed myself again. FML
Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 34
I automatically read "meditate" as "**********". Oops
chippa 24
Does a 50 year old man wear boxers or briefs? Depends! (Get some.)
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Comments (63)
chippa 24
Does a 50 year old man wear boxers or briefs? Depends! (Get some.)
Wolvander88 19
How does it make a difference unless he was wearing a diaper?
chippa 24
Depends is a brand of diaper-underwear hybrid...
AshhyTheBlonde 8
Duh! 8- Idiot. It was a joke! I found it quite funny myself:D
Unbweavable 17
Clever
Myo_fml 20
Sucking up gets you nowhere, 26. As you'll soon see, commenting upon that fact goes nowhere as well but at this point, I'm bury baiting.
MormonPornstar 7
Hey uh... 42? She's hot, so your argument is invalid. Cheers :)
WCARlover 34
I automatically read "meditate" as "**********". Oops
Enslaved 36
Haha-- Well, it does relieve stress.
Schizomaniac 24
You know you've been around FML too long when...
razbery_nerd 4
Well we all know where your minds at!
HeyHeyFishFillet 34
No big deal, this happens to everyone.
afrothunder666 5
So urine a lot of stress huh? I hear meditating is good for that... Oh, maybe not hahaha
Yousuck24 21
What a piss poor attempt at a pun...
Hannahmgp 9
Clearly, this guy is not a wizz at puns.
bettykooler 7
I see what you did there..
wickedninja918 1
idk i thought it was kinda funny (but thats probably just pee)
Wolvander88 19
So, that happened..
ArmyxWife 5
You're a *beep*ing idiot -_-
WritingWrongs 8
Yes it did! Very good! Now can you tell us what didn't happen?
Whaaaaaat734 6
^Intelligence.
Gulianna 2
At least it wasn't sleep paralysis. That would've been STRESSFUL!
iOceanus 18
I find sleep paralysis to be an interestingly weird experience every time it happens.
PeteyPablo12308 20
I hate it! It scares the shit out of me.
BradyT918 9
I enjoy it. It makes it very easy to enter a lucid dream
Kallian_fml 21
Congratulations grasshopper. You have achieved the ultimate state of relaxation.
tsim14 4
Not until he soils himself from the rear has he achieved the "ultimate" state.
DocBastard 38
At least it wasn't your anal sphincter that relaxed.
amandajlucas2015 2
Maybe it did and there was just nothing that needed to come out lol
secretsymbiote21 5
hey that stuff happens. hopefully your friend didn't notice. and if he did. FYL
perdix 29
Now, you smell of urine and have to walk around in public sporting a giant pee stain. I'm guessing that's more stressful than the state you were in before. Your friend must be a bear of a yogi.
Hannahmgp 9
Go watch a movie or something, I don't think meditation seems cut out for you.