Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year-old boy. FML
Today, while lifeguarding, a kid thought it'd be hilarious to take a crap in the pool. The other kids freaked out and rushed to get out. Several of them slipped on the way out and hurt themselves fairly badly. Two parents are now threatening to sue us, and my boss blames me. FML
Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Today, at my job as a sailing instructor, I had to stop kids from getting their asses sucked by a pool filter. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old boyfriend why it is not okay to pee in the pool. FML
Today, I had to explain to my son why it is not okay to slap old women's butts. He's 16. FML
Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year-olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML
Today, I was fired because a patron complained that she didn't like the way I kept staring at her kids. I was a lifeguard. FML
Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML
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Top comments
s0m3guy2010 21
No need to be so anal about it.
3040evan 2
Wow do people really do this in front of everyone.
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Comments (142)
charla6609 2
Ummm… i would be scared
mexicoman101 6
Probably a bunch of tweekers who got ****** up and decised to go swimming.
osm1989_fml 6
Not once in my entire life has this thought ever occurred to me: "I think it would be so much fun to stick objects up my butt. It would be even better if my friends joined me at a public place." I simply fail to see the appeal.
hateevryone 15
Smdh
PhishloverA 14
People need to grow up
KiddNYC1O 22
That's a new low of boredom.
worldclassrager 41
honestly I have never seen that...I guess my local pool they have that already set...
paul0397 3
What, what in da butt? (Tosh.0 reference)
chinagirl3343 8
Why didn't you kick them out? Seriously??? Throw them out!
AgentTaco 6
Maybe they're practicing for their BROmance? O.o