Today, while at the beach, my son needed to pee. I told him to pee in the ocean. He took off his pants and peed from the beach to the water. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 3-year-old son decided to pull down his pants and pee outside as our local city's parade had just started marching down the street. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
Today, I took my kids to the beach. My autistic son decided it was a good idea to pretend he was drowning. I tried to tell onlookers he was fine and not to worry. My son popped out of the water and laughed hysterically at them. FML
Today, I went for a swim in the sea. It was early and I was the only one in the water. I swam out far, then my tummy rumbled big time. Next thing I knew, I'd shat my shorts. It went everywhere. I had to scoop the poop out with my hand and wash it off whilst swimming back to shore. I had to shower afterwards. FML
Today, at the beach, my son was screaming and crying because the sand was burning his feet. I told him to put on his sandals. He got mad and threw them in the ocean, then started crying harder when he realized they were gone. He's now hiding under the bed in the condo and is refusing to come out. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is two miles away from the park. FML
Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML
Today, my father taught my son to pee on the trees outside. We went to the mall later and my son decided to practice what he'd learned on a potted plant. FML
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Top comments
WantsHazzasGravy 11
YDI for telling him to do it.
Hollandiscrazy 12
There are two sorts of people in the world: people who say they pee in the shower and dirty ******* liars. Now pants on, pants off doesn't really matter...
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Comments (106)
fml0505 22
Please tell me he pulled a Butters, that would make my day!
SirEbro 7
He was just doing what you told him.
iiTzNeeNerz 26
Next time be more specific? I'd watch it OP, you might have a smart ass in the making lol
ninjalovin 8
The pee doesn't fall far from the penis.
j_cat187 20
What if you pee of a cliff?
MissVeracity 12
It's not his fault as he probably just misunderstood, bless him.. You should really teach your kid some manners though, it's not nice to others.
chabelo 10
the ocean? thats disrespectful, next time show him how to do it with a bottle..
yanksby7 6
Wow...people are really upset about this. If it was a pool I'd understand, but the ocean? Really? Sorry OP...I thought it was funny as hell! FYL!
avapaige1234 19
That's an obedient son you've got there!
XSeraphinX 18
Just eww.... What is wrong with people?!
1crabbygirl 10
Note to self: Be more explicit in future. Quite cute actually.