Amanda
Canada
Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
rachelllynne
Manchester, United Kingdom
Today, the woman I babysat for blamed me for the cut on her son's face, and fired me with no pay for not looking after him properly. He already had the cut when I arrived. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Smash the patriarchy!
Today, I got home to my son with a bruised face and my daughter locked in her room. Apparently, when she got home from work, her unemployed brother asked her when she was going to cook dinner, so she punched him in the head. He’s so entitled that he actually thought he’d get sympathy from me. FML
anon
United States
Straight to jail
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
mandy
United States
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
ddhaley1
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Edmond, United States
Sorry sweetie
Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML
angry mama
The Headmaster Ritual
Today, while picking my daughter up from school, I saw her being beaten by two boys while the teacher stood there doing nothing. I ran to help, but then she pushed one of the boys off her. The teacher then pulled her away, yelled at her and then yelled at me for "not raising my kid right." FML
unknown
United States
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
uterurist
Saint Paul, United States
Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML
little_star78
Bloomfield Hills, United States
Evil child
Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML
ournhd
United States
Today, I got bailed out of jail. I was there because I saw a girl being hit by her boyfriend. I rushed over to help only to have her hit me repeatedly. The cops came and she blamed her bruises on me. The boyfriend corroborated her story. FML
Top comments
Cysioland 8
I think you should sue her to death
waffule365 16
Maybe you could give the babysitter a few bruises.
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Comments (212)
GoneClubbin 9
Haha that's hilarious kill that bitch!!!!
Vulkfury 8
Babysitter probably grew up in a 'man enough to throw a punch, man enough to take a punch' environment but instead of hitting the child you could just take away what they want like TV ect but in the babysitters defence some children can be very annoying an stressful.
SynysterNero 20
You could get her arrested for hitting your child.
DJEddieXZ 9
and I hope you wore that ass out OP!!
doglover100 28
Fire her, take pictures of the bruises unless the police do that.
djsammyc 19
and your babysitter is as competant as a 5 year old
Jebitesevsi 11
Why should other people allow themselves to be hit, just because you're not capable of teaching your kid not to hit others? If you utilized this approach once or twice, your kid wouldn't be going around, trying to beat everyone else.
Luluthus 41
If that was me, the babysitter would have a few bruises when she left
WildJubeJube 16
THATS A HORRIBLE BABYSITTER, YOUR POOR KID!
victordstory 15
This was in a video of theirs, the FML guys