Today, when I asked my boss why my bonus was cut in half, he replied, "I have no idea what you really do." I'm the IT Manager. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, at work, my computer started acting up. I told my boss I could fix it, but he told me to call the IT department instead. Neither the IT technician or his supervisor could figure it out, so I showed them what was wrong and how to fix it. I was promptly fired for wasting 2 hours of company time. FML
Today, I did my work, the work of my co-worker who called in sick and the work of my boss who has no idea what the hell is going on all at the same time. I didn't get a promotion because I don't work hard enough. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He responded with, "Who the hell are you?" FML
Today, my manager did that thing where he gave me a performance-based bonus last month, but deducted the bonus from this months pay. He didn’t even try to hide it, it said in plain English "Amount deducted for previous performance bonus." FML
Today, I had to give a presentation on how we can improve our department metrics to a group of dumb executives who keep confusing and mixing up IT departments. Our department is doing great, the problem is that the executives keep mixing up the departments and blame us for everything. FML
Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. He laughed at me and said, "That's hilarious because I was going to ask you if you could take a pay cut!" FML
Today, my boss complained about how his performance bonus is too small, as he expected it to be the total amount accrued rather than a percentage. He also made the decision to not give any of the employees profit sharing this year, because the company didn't beat the budgeted increase in profits. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for not being able to fix his computer. I’m not in IT, I wasn’t hired to have anything to do with IT, but he assumes that because I’m the youngest woman in the building and look like a nerd that I’m automatically a computer expert. I don’t even own my own computer at home. FML
Today, my boss told me that people from work have been complaining about me. Apparently, I'm not doing part of their jobs for them, and the other manager sometimes does. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML
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Top comments
Connect 10
I say you take away his Internet. Just for awhile. He'll come and find you in the hopes you'll be able to help him.
lexa1love 16
Aw OP that is brutal. Maybe print off the job description and lay it on his desk if he really can't figure that out.
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Comments (56)
Sakura13_fml 11
"Oh, I'm the one who gets rid of the virsuses from **** people download." That should secure your bonus.
Catkam623 27
Shhhhhh we don't do that ;)
rocker_chick105 31
There must be something against IT workers/managers because they're all over FML :p
frethelt 3
its not a very highly thought of job.. the only time you think about is when you have an issue... then you just get mad and upset that it takes so long for your issue to get addressed... what you dont realize is they are dealing with the 85% that are usless and cant figure out simple stuff... like "why is my monitor blank" answer "is the computer on" user "yes the light is on" IT "the light on the tower or the light on the moniter" user "whats the tower?"
JanisEvans 10
Oh you are, OP? So what's your point then?
mfischer 17
Yes they are, OP. They posted the, FML. That makes them the, OP.
aFreedom127 9
Maybe it's time to introduce yourself!
CountDuk 5
I'm sorry, but damn you are gorgeous. Okay, enough of that.
Blurgas 16
Seems to be a good chunk of the business world. If someone doesn't understand a profession or thinks it's "easy" they assume it doesn't cost much. In this case, it's just derp caused by ignorance
rhysfucker 24
Time for a little self promotion. "It's a poor frog that won't take care of his own pond."
DasHaas 9
I'd suggest just not letting your department do anything for a few weeks, but odds are the whole company grinds to a halt. Generally what works is to simply make a note to your boss every time you do something. "Today I made fixed a pc that allowed our sales people to sell 1 million products". And keep emailing them until he understands just what you do. (In an ideal world, you'd toss the idiot out a window, but that's kinda frowned upon I guess.)
poccocurantes 7
Part of the problem is corporate culture. I call it the cult of mediocracy. If you work in the corporate office you are infallible and accountability only applies to those outside the inner circle. IT people generally still fall outside the inner circle and their work is usually not understood by the corporate geniuses. Not true of all companies, but I am sure a lot of you work for companies like this.
The_Omniscient 2
Well don't tell me, tell him
U_GotitDude 18
Block his internet
poccocurantes 7
Hopefully you won't be fired for poor sales performance.