Today, when I asked my boss why my bonus was cut in half, he replied, "I have no idea what you really do." I'm the IT Manager. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, at work, my computer started acting up. I told my boss I could fix it, but he told me to call the IT department instead. Neither the IT technician or his supervisor could figure it out, so I showed them what was wrong and how to fix it. I was promptly fired for wasting 2 hours of company time. FML
Today, I did my work, the work of my co-worker who called in sick and the work of my boss who has no idea what the hell is going on all at the same time. I didn't get a promotion because I don't work hard enough. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He responded with, "Who the hell are you?" FML
Today, my manager did that thing where he gave me a performance-based bonus last month, but deducted the bonus from this months pay. He didn’t even try to hide it, it said in plain English "Amount deducted for previous performance bonus." FML
Today, I had to give a presentation on how we can improve our department metrics to a group of dumb executives who keep confusing and mixing up IT departments. Our department is doing great, the problem is that the executives keep mixing up the departments and blame us for everything. FML
Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. He laughed at me and said, "That's hilarious because I was going to ask you if you could take a pay cut!" FML
Today, my boss complained about how his performance bonus is too small, as he expected it to be the total amount accrued rather than a percentage. He also made the decision to not give any of the employees profit sharing this year, because the company didn't beat the budgeted increase in profits. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for not being able to fix his computer. I’m not in IT, I wasn’t hired to have anything to do with IT, but he assumes that because I’m the youngest woman in the building and look like a nerd that I’m automatically a computer expert. I don’t even own my own computer at home. FML
Today, my boss told me that people from work have been complaining about me. Apparently, I'm not doing part of their jobs for them, and the other manager sometimes does. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML
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Top comments
Connect 10
I say you take away his Internet. Just for awhile. He'll come and find you in the hopes you'll be able to help him.
lexa1love 16
Aw OP that is brutal. Maybe print off the job description and lay it on his desk if he really can't figure that out.
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Comments (56)
dcats 13
Quit work for one day. If he notices then you have a case.
bubble_burst 16
I saw monitor his network usage. Report all unofficial usage: ****, Youtube, job hunts to management. When he'll be fired, tell him thats what u do.
aml1991 9
Don't forget Facebook, FML, and MySpace!
ravenevercross 19
Two words: Network Crash
kaeli2003 11
Oh we are always so undervalued!!!
babeababe 16
Just because he doesn't know what you do,(and he should if he's the boss) doesn't mean he can cut your bonus in half. If you earned that money it's yours. You should stand up for yourself.
ohreallynow1992 3
It's a bonus, not OP's regular paycheck. They're in addition to your paycheck, something most people don't get.
free2speak 14
Wrong, it stands for Internet Persons. Somebody tried to convince me it was Internet technology. Doesn't even make sense. Hi I work as an Internet persons tech sounds much better than Internet technology tech.
Patswillreign 2
Just change his wallpaper to gay **** and disable his ability to change it
aml1991 9
IT people are so unappreciated! Sorry OP.
CuMorrigu 14
Been there, done that.
Blackcatluck 19
No, It is a clown that kidnaps children but luckily four boys and a girl stopped It even when It returns.