Today, trying to look cool, I threw my coke bottle in the air, and tried to catch it with one hand. I missed and it fell to the floor. Luckily, it wasn't open, but in my unimaginable stupidity, I opened it less than five seconds later. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML
Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML
Today, I was in class with a water bottle on my desk. I was on my phone not paying attention, when some girl knocked it over by accident. I went to grab it, even though it was in the corner of my eye. I caught the bottle of water but I also happened to grab her ass at the same time. FML
Today, as a prank I shook my girlfriend's can of soda. I hadn't noticed that it was already open. FML
Today, I attempted to open a water bottle. My hand started bleeding before I was able to get the cap loose. FML
Today, I heroically caught a falling cup of coffee that I'd knocked off the counter. I thought I'd saved the day, until I realized I didn’t actually grab the cup; I'd grabbed the hot coffee directly with my bare hand. I spent the next few seconds hopping around like a maniac while everyone in the office watched. FML
Today, my friend had a Coke can on his desk in class. It was empty but I was thirsty so I picked it up thinking I could try to get that little bit of Coke always left at the bottom. When I took a sip I found out he had been picking his fingernails and putting them in the can. FML
Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML
Today, someone threw an open soda can at me from a car. It missed, so they circled around and threw an unopened can. That one hit. FML
Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML
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Top comments
TeaCakes 3
...Even if you did do it right, it still wouldn't make you look 'cool'.
FMLshark 12
"trying to look cool": The universal YDI phrase.
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Comments (102)
calliefornia2 3
Your life is ****** all because you dropped your soda trying to be cool, then opened it?... What a sad sad life..
jackassfan 7
How exactly would that make you look cool?
Fonze13 0
Girls: OMG look at that he just throw a soda can in the air and got it with one hand :0 I want him so bad
kittykarkrash 6
Oh cute :3 someone is really smart! I would have laughed so hard this did make me laugh anyway
GameDirection 0
...And that would make you look cool, how? "Hey guys, I can catch a bottle!" Not seeing it here.
isaiaah 6
Your doin' it wrong
supermegafoxy 6
Lol! Girl: *Throws bottle up in the air.* *Catches it.* Guy: "Wow, that's probably one of the coolest things I've ever seen. Wanna be my girlfriend?"
johngaltmovement 8
When I saw "I threw my coke bottle" I knew there was a problem
klatt 8
L
maleOFequality 0
'Today, trying to look cool...' Immediate ydi.