tbright010
United States
Today, the highlight of my day was learning how to drain my dog's anal glands. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
It's a doggy dog world
Today, I was bathing my dog at a self-serve dog wash at a pet store. The person next to me decided to express his dog's anal glands, and the vile, greasy, fish-smelling liquid hit me on the side of my face. FML
Steve
Self-defeating move
Today, my dog discovered his new toilet by taking a dump on his own bowl. FML
hoo flung pu
United States
Today, my dog figured out she can wipe her butthole on my walls after having squeezed out a turd or two. FML
poomaster
United States
Today, I spent an hour at work trying to make a tortoise poo. When he finally did, I was so excited and felt pretty triumphant. Then I realized that my job was to make animals drop their load. FML
Anonymous Taco Man
United States
Top of the mornin' to ya!
Today, my dog had REALLY bad diarrhea. I found that out when I woke up to find it all over my bed. FML
anonymous
Huffman, United States
Sneaky boy
Today, I decided to give my dog a bath. Instead, my dog gave me a bath. FML
Anonymous
New Kensington, United States
Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML
banj0
Madison, United States
Pink tax
Today, I had to pry my sister's used tampon out from between my dog's jaws. FML
mike h
Mcadoo, United States
Today, I started my dream job of being a veterinarian. My first day consisted of having to put down 12 dogs and 5 cats. FML
Anonymous
Puebla City, Mexico
Dirty boy
Today, I discovered that one of my dogs has taken a liking to rolling over his own poop. I found out by petting him. FML
Top comments
Wdgames 0
Kinky
Banana_Pancakes6 0
Admit it, you loved it.
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Comments (119)
Shinygirlnz 1
Ew. But also, stop taking a backseat in your life, if you want interesting things to happen, get out there and do something.
mrahhhhh 21
Today there was nothing to gain But to ease my dog's pain I had to pump out the gland My day ceased to be bland I should just try to get lain. FML.
DocBastard 38
A solid 8.2, Mr. Ahhhh. You would have gotten an 8.7, but that damn Romanian judge seems to hate you.
redc 10
I'd give you a solid 8.9
T3P33_fml 0
this FML gave me a solid boner. ow and nice, 8.6
Darklord6980 5
Ew...u goddamn sick bastard
MrsxBillxKaulitz 5
icky. :p
fatalkiss 0
I mean... that is interesting though, not everyday you can learn something like that. If that's too boring for you, go ahead & ditch the poor sick dog while you look for adventures.
MysticMint 0
You learn something new everyday, I suppose.
j_cat187 19
howd u do it
5t3ff1k4h 44
I am getting horrifying images here. I think you were successful, for once.
Javalounge 0
That explains the buttscraping across the carpet.
phatdaddy62 23
Career Opportunity!
drew2711 0
You should explore your dog's anal glands for a more adventurous day?