Today, the guy who sits next to me in my psychology class openly admitted to torturing animals as a child. It's going to be a long semester. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, in my psychology class, the creepy guy who sits beside me every day leans over and says, "I have an upset stomach, I may have to use the bathroom." FML
Today, after some filing mistakes, and a lot of waiting on hold, I'm finally registered for Spring classes. I was ready to enjoy this term, until I found out that my ex, who was forced into therapy after he threatened to kill me, is in half of my classes. FML
Today, I found FML for the first time in class, and literally laughed out loud in the middle of the lecture in front of 200 classmates. Today's lecture? The cruelties of slavery. FML
Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML
Today, I excitedly started my first university psychology course. Enthusiastic and ready to learn, I listened as my teacher introduced himself. Turns out he's a major transphobe, who is in cahoots with the likes of Jordan Peterson and Ray Blanchard. Only 12 weeks to go. FML
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend was a kid, she enjoyed torturing animals for fun. Nice to know she was lying when she said the idea of harming an animal “makes her sick to her stomach.” FML
Today, I was teaching and a boy sitting in front kept laughing and smiling, even after I asked him to cut it out. I got so annoyed that I jokingly said I'd knock his teeth out, and asked him to leave the class. The kid went to the principal and told him I intended to hurt him. I'm a college professor. FML
Today, the new girl told me that a guy at the back of the class was being creepy. I looked over and saw him picking his nose and flinging boogers at the girls sitting in the front. That guy is my boyfriend. FML
Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML
Today, the woman who sits behind me in class showed up. She shrieks in laughter until she has coughing fits every time anything even remotely sexual is mentioned, including evidence in sexual assault cases. Lectures are 3 hours long, twice a week, and I need this class to graduate. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
EpicPear 0
"Hi! My name is Bob and I torture animals! Nice to meet you!"
ancora 1
Future serial killer in the making? I'm probably watching too many crime dramas, but supposedly that doesn't bode well.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (88)
soldierinarms 0
little bit ironic
jewban 3
yeah 38 until they kill you... lol
gitarex 4
that would be the next serial killer
Anteezy 7
I think you misunderstood when he admitted that he choked his chicken a lot as a kid.
zolltf 4
OP stole this from a french canadian book, Le Passager from Patrick Sénecal...
rattusrattus 19
Maybe he thought the psycholoGY CLASS was in fact as psycholoGIST.
officechairsoldi 0
That's scary...that's an early childhood indicator of psycopathic behavior. You might wanna switch seats...just saying.
savvy_suzy 0
Watch you back OP and make sure someone in your life knows about this beyond a few thousand random strangers on the internet. Torturing small animals is a warning sign and they are proud enough to tell someone about it. Talk to your instructor/professor or some sort of authority to protect yourself (both in case you're the one who is hurt from them or if someone else is hurt and you are dragged in for some reason... I mean, this person feels comfortable enough to tell you this sort of thing, they may be psychotic enough to drag you into the drama somehow).
savvy_suzy 0
Watch you back OP and make sure someone in your life knows about this beyond a few thousand random strangers on the internet. Torturing small animals is a warning sign and they are proud enough to tell someone about it. Talk to your instructor/professor or some sort of authority to protect yourself (either in case you're the one who is hurt from them or if someone else is hurt and you are dragged in for some reason... I mean, this person feels comfortable enough to tell you this sort of thing, they may be psychotic enough to drag you into the drama somehow).
ygdrassil 17
Do you by chance sit next to Jared Loughner?