Animals: Today, on my rush to get home from work to use the bathroom,...

By Wet Britches - 24/11/2016 01:32 - United States - Portland

Today, on my rush to get home from work to use the bathroom, I hit a deer. It startled me so badly that I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 674

You deserved it 1 574

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Same thing different taste

By Bianka05 - 19/07/2017 20:00

Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 981

You deserved it 955

By Mel - 07/05/2011 22:27 - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 961

You deserved it 12 958

By TheMichaelNixon - 14/11/2009 21:37 - United States

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 799

You deserved it 75 505

When nature calls…

By Anonymous - 23/10/2022 22:00 - Australia

Today, I got the strong urge to pee right as I got home from work. In my hurry to get inside, I grabbed my keys out of my pocket. They flew out of my hand, into the bushes. I couldn't find them in time and ended up wetting myself in my driveway, three minutes before I had to pick my daughter up from school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 903

You deserved it 172

By Karaline45 - 15/12/2018 05:00

Today, I bought a new car. Twenty-five minutes into driving it home, I hit a deer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 636

You deserved it 368

By Bambi - 12/08/2009 06:49 - United States

Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 193

You deserved it 46 171

By Pissy pants - 24/11/2018 13:30

Today, I had a horrible headache on my way home from lunch. I pulled over and vomited so forcefully I peed my pants, a lot. I had pee in my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 179

You deserved it 224

By Pisspants - 17/09/2016 04:39 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 138

You deserved it 2 830

By Anonymous - 01/05/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, I had to pee really bad so I tried to unlock my door as fast as I could. I put my key in and turned it too hard, the key snapped inside. I ended up peeing on myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 886

You deserved it 13 662

Faulty plumbing

By Anonymous - 08/02/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 97

stevenJB 25

Friday 25 November 2016 9:21

I can't tell much you grow to hate deer coming from growing up in a densly deer populated area. I've hit a few myself and they'll do more damage to the car than you do them half the time. let's be glad you wet yourself rather than waking up dead or inside an ambulance. it could've been worse believe me.

JaffaMC 13

Friday 25 November 2016 9:22

F the deer's life, I'd say... "Today, I really had to use the bathroom, so I quickly tried to cross the road. A human hit me with their car. FML"

Comments

meggieeeeee92 16

Saturday 26 November 2016 6:20

But why didn't you just use the bathroom before leaving work? You would have avoided rushing home and hitting the poor deer.

AppleMango 8

Saturday 26 November 2016 11:47

Poor deer :( I remember reading somewhere that apparently wetting yourself is common in car accidents because your seat belt pushes on your bladder, so maybe this and also you no longer concentrating on not peeing contributed. I agree with the other comments saying that it's good that you just peed yourself since much worse things could have happened too. Try and focus on the positive and I hope everything turns out okay :)

ber4fun 23

Saturday 26 November 2016 20:12

If you really have to go that bad, why not just stop somewhere along the way? Any shop or restaurant is better than wrecking your vehicle and taking an animals life all in one go.