Love: Today, my wife wanted me to take her to a new restaurant in town....

By wounded pride, intact cock - 17/01/2015 18:49 - United States

Today, my wife wanted me to take her to a new restaurant in town. When I looked it up and saw their prices, I almost had a heart attack. When I said it was too expensive, she snapped "Maybe you'd like to look up 'Lorena Bobbitt' next?!" We went to the restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 661

You deserved it 6 798

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By steak through the heart - 18/11/2014 18:57 - United States - El Monte

Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 092

You deserved it 4 131

Self own + Karma

By Anonymous - 07/03/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, I was really excited to go on a date with my girlfriend. We were sat in the restaurant looking at our menus when she suddenly frowned and said someone was watching us from across the street. I turned to see who it was. My wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 1 832

Ragebait

By Fortunes Fool - 02/12/2024 21:00 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend out to Outback Steakhouse. We went to one outside of town because my wife works at our local one. When we got there, guess who we saw? I forgot she transferred to another location, which just happened to be this one. Goddamit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71

You deserved it 1 942

By jgboy - 14/09/2014 15:32 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I took my girlfriend of a year out on a date, a nice fancy dinner and a movie. After dinner, I said that I was feeling sick and just wanted to go home. I didn't have the heart to tell her that dinner was so expensive that I didn't have money for the movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 220

You deserved it 9 517

By naughtytwinsisters - 25/02/2011 08:27 - Philippines

Today, our boss asked us out to lunch and told us to choose wherever we wanted to eat. Thinking that she’d be paying for it, we chose a pricey seafood restaurant. When we'd eaten, she told us that we could pay her back later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 667

You deserved it 33 456

Family matters

By food critic - 22/12/2016 14:26 - Australia - Ryde

Today, I saw my girlfriend's mother tagged at a restaurant, the same one I had suggested we try earlier in the week. At the time, she quickly shut me down because "that place sounds terrible". I guess she forgot that she finally added me on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 809

You deserved it 609

Whatthefuckaburger

By r u kidding me? - 09/06/2020 20:00

Today, after my girlfriend continuously whined for hours about a specific burger place, I finally gave in and we drove nearly two hours to get there. Once in line, she looked at the menu, then decided everything had too many calories and wanted to go home. She doesn’t get why I’m pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 900

You deserved it 338

By whatdidIdo - 03/09/2011 05:33 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 839

You deserved it 3 814

By Anonymous - 01/05/2011 05:50 - United States

Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 747

You deserved it 4 484

By Iron11 - 14/06/2016 20:52

Today, I had a date with a girl I've liked for a while. We went out to a nice Italian restaurant for dinner. I was obviously going to pay, but when the bill came I realized I'd forgotten my wallet. When I told her, she thought I was a cheap liar and now she won't answer my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 781

You deserved it 4 420

juturnaamo 29

Sunday 18 January 2015 2:55

She recently died in s car accident. Some dick cut her off.

Shamandalie89 32

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:09

Some crazy bitch who chopped off her husband's penis.

Comments

StickyPickles 33

Sunday 18 January 2015 2:43

******* ouch

Clevelandians 17

Sunday 18 January 2015 2:48

Fake and gay

heyLaddieHey 18

Sunday 18 January 2015 3:22

Whether it was a joke or not, I would at least consider separating for a while.

buckdharma 37

Sunday 18 January 2015 3:32

Don't let your wife leave the tip. Don't!!!

elyx_fml 16

Sunday 18 January 2015 3:43

Holy molly!

classicsparkles 17

Sunday 18 January 2015 3:56

I would have told her to take herself.

pharm121 21

Sunday 18 January 2015 4:01

Your wife is crazy...

yerawizardlizzy 27

Sunday 18 January 2015 4:06

I had to look her up; I was very young when the trial happened. Not only is that a crazy threat to make, but she is insuating some seriously bad ideas about your relationship. I would seek professional help for your relationship at the very least.