Today, my wife compared me to Sid the sloth from Ice Age. Same smile, same eyes, same belly, same big feet. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my husband compared me to his parents' dog. Why? Because when I sleep, I fart and scare myself awake. Just like his parents' dog. FML
Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said, "Wait, sloths are real?" She thought Ice Age made them up. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were finishing up a romantic dinner, she gazed into my eyes for a moment and said, "You know, sometimes you look like a character from Sesame Street." FML
Today, my family and I watched Madagascar 2. When we got to the part where Gloria the hippopotamus is praised for her chunkyness, my little sister looked at me and said, "If you were a hippo, maybe then you would get a date." FML
Today, my date told me I have a smile that "reminds him of his grandma." Then he showed me a picture. I look exactly like her. FML
Today, I was told I looked like Beaker from the Muppets. After doing a side-by-side comparison, I realized it's true. FML
Today, my wife asked me if she looked cute in a new dress that she bought earlier today. I told her that she almost looks like a supermodel. Appearantly "almost" doesn't cut it. Guess who's sleeping on the couch. FML
Today, while looking through my wedding photos, I realised my wife had done a duck face in every single one. FML
Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML
Today, my girlfriend said I looked like ET and made me pose next to a full scale model of him while she took a picture. She's showing her friends the picture and they agree. FML
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Top comments
trollsemen 8
Where's the mammoth then?
IAmNotAnAnimal 9
PINECONE!
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Comments (139)
wannbaussiegurl 4
ya you probably shouldn't post this kinda stuff...
MD_DILF 4
You probably smell the same too! Take a shower dirt ball!!
stogebreak7 4
wow spank her
SummerTime69 5
That's ******* awesome broheem
crazycat123 0
Sid is adorable :3
viciouspanda 0
Hahah that's cute.
sweetangelgal 3
lol wow ur wife dnt love u lol
Strych9Nobra 0
Haha! My ex did too! Lisp and all!
fackincrazy 0
Did you tell her that she was like the mammoth fat, hairy and ugly.
ReefTheLostCauze 0
u must be ugly