Today, my vegetarian girlfriend put some ghost pepper hot sauce on my steak to teach me a "lesson" about eating meat. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML
Today, I found out that the so-called vegetarian soy sauce my mom has made for me several times has minced meat in it. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML
Today, as a big fan of spicy food and a huge challenge seeker, I decided to try the hottest burger I could order. Despite being warned by a waitress, I went for it. After eating a third, I had trouble breathing from the spiciness. The waitress was smirking. FML
Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
Today, my daughter said she wanted to be vegetarian like me. Beaming with pride, I made her plant-based burgers for dinner. She took one bite, screamed, "EW!" and started crying and begging for beef burgers. FML
Today, my daughter came home from school crying hysterically. Apparently, her teacher is a vegan douchebag who told the whole class, "If your family eats meat, they're eating your future!" Now she screams when we eat meat. FML
Today, I went on my first date with a girl I have been infatuated with for months. At the restaurant, the waiter came while she was in the bathroom. I ordered steaks for both of us. Turns out, she is vegetarian, and doesn't like it when men are "overly aggressive." She called me a cow murderer. FML
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Top comments
wysteria14 17
I'm vegan, and I can say that she's gone way too far. If she can't deal with her partner eating meat, she needs to find someone else.
iceking53 8
that's adding spice to the relationship
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Comments (280)
LisGabrielle 7
And another idea OP, make her a salad, and put small strands of chicken. If you mix it well, it will be undetectableb because most people just stab a forkfull instead of examining it. When she's done, tell her about the chicken and say, "That was lesson about burning my f-ing mouth."
faith_02 5
Why were you dating a vegetarian?
bigdaddyeric 37
Did she use the other side of the steak on her black eye after you thanked her?
baahs101 4
Teach her a lesson and kick her in the teeth no crazy bitch should mess with a steak.
yzgu 9
She's a bitch and she owes you a steak. Her choices are hers - and hers alone. Are you trying to force your choices on her? Doesn't sound like it from your post. Seriously, she owes you a steak. And an apology. I abhor rude behavior.
LaurenRoxsU 9
I don't understand why people feel the need to change others. I made a choice not to eat meat but my whole family (extended too) eats it, plus my friends. I even cooked a turkey for Christmas (sans removal, because that's blech) because I make an awsmsauce turkey. Why? Because they were gonna buy the turkey anyway just as every year. And it's their choice to eat whatever the hell they want. So I make my thing, they make theirs and boom. I'm happy with my decision and the world keeps turning. This issue is a lot deeper than vegetarian vs meat eating. It's trust and respect. Or lack thereof.
codyslong 12
Leave her. If she can't accept your manly habit, she needs a girlfriend
janaek683 12
sounds like someone needs a new girlfriend
rana102 5
who does that !!
at0micmin3r 23
"MUSHROOM IS MURDER!1" "PLANT RIGHTS!!1" Rub it in her face about how you eat fruit-cruelty free.