Today, my vegetarian girlfriend put some ghost pepper hot sauce on my steak to teach me a "lesson" about eating meat. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML
Today, I found out that the so-called vegetarian soy sauce my mom has made for me several times has minced meat in it. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML
Today, as a big fan of spicy food and a huge challenge seeker, I decided to try the hottest burger I could order. Despite being warned by a waitress, I went for it. After eating a third, I had trouble breathing from the spiciness. The waitress was smirking. FML
Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
Today, my daughter said she wanted to be vegetarian like me. Beaming with pride, I made her plant-based burgers for dinner. She took one bite, screamed, "EW!" and started crying and begging for beef burgers. FML
Today, my daughter came home from school crying hysterically. Apparently, her teacher is a vegan douchebag who told the whole class, "If your family eats meat, they're eating your future!" Now she screams when we eat meat. FML
Today, I went on my first date with a girl I have been infatuated with for months. At the restaurant, the waiter came while she was in the bathroom. I ordered steaks for both of us. Turns out, she is vegetarian, and doesn't like it when men are "overly aggressive." She called me a cow murderer. FML
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Top comments
wysteria14 17
I'm vegan, and I can say that she's gone way too far. If she can't deal with her partner eating meat, she needs to find someone else.
iceking53 8
that's adding spice to the relationship
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Comments (280)
Sudden_flame57 5
Sounds yummy
Fou_Lou 20
Hope she is your ex girlfriend. That move is kinda sad.
Starham1 14
If it was me, I would have eaten it anyway. I actually just take some hot sauce to my room and sip on it once in a while. I know, can't be healthy, but I love it.
hambro 9
your shit gonna hurt
ItsR0sie 18
I'm not a vegetarian but this has proven your girlfriend rocks man!
jordanashley211 20
It should be illegal to ruin a steak like that.
AbsyntheMayhem 23
I would break up with her. That's horrible! She had no right to tell you what you could and could not eat, even more so now that she dumped that god awful stuff in your steak!
thatonetribute 31
Drop that crazy chick like a rock. Do want you want, not what she tries to make you do!
lrw87 22
The bible clearly states that every moving thing that lives shall be food for you. And as I have you the green plants, I gave you everything...genesis 9:3. One person believes he may eat anything while the weak person eats only vegetables. Let not the one who eats despise the one who abstains, for God has welcomed him. Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? Romans 14:1-23. Food will not commend us to God. We are no worse off if we do not eat, and no better off if we do. Corinthians 8:8.......need I go on? Eat whatever you want, but it's wrong to push your life choices off on someone else. It's no different than me torturing a gay person because I'm straight.
PricelessUM 6
Hold it right there #2 i'm a vegetarian and i'm with a guy that eats meat. We compromise by him not eating meat on days I see him, and me not eating peanut butter and various nuts (he's allergic) when I see him. Sometimes you just got to make sacrifices for someone who's worth it. :) Habits don't define how amazing of a person you are and how amazing the other person is.