Today, my psychotic, very jealous ex-boyfriend appeared out of nowhere and punched a male store clerk who was helping me look for azaleas in a garden center. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my psycho ex boyfriend, who I broke up with over a month ago showed up at my work yelling and crying because I didn't get him anything for his birthday. My boss now thinks I'm an asshole. FML
Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML
Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store and saw my ex with her new partner. I tried to hide from them, but ended up getting locked in the store after closing time. I had to call security to let me out. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my psycho ex trying to break down my apartment door. FML
Today, I found out someone, most likely my psycho ex, has been posing as me on local interest websites, trolling a load of people, and giving them my address so they can come fight me. I found this out when a gentleman showed up at my house wanting to beat me shitless. FML
Today, my boyfriend came to visit me. He told me he was cheating on me, and that he wanted to break up. I was so angry that as he left, I started screaming at him out of my second story apartment window. I picked up a huge potted plant and shoved it through the window at him. It missed my ex and hit my car. FML
Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML
Today, my obsessive ex, who recently cut my phone line to stop me from talking to my boyfriend of three years, got a job at the same restaurant where both my boyfriend and I work. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my friend when I saw my boyfriend in Victoria's Secret - with another girl. They were joking and laughing, and I was really pissed off. So I stormed into the store and slapped him. He looked up at me with an angry and confused expression. It wasn't my boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
TrippingOnAcid 29
It's time to apply for a restraining order
allie2590 31
You found the azaleas, he found an assault charge.
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Comments (82)
pearl_bridgman 8
He sounds like a serious threat to your safety. I hope the police were involved and would definitely recommend a restraining order.
shanannygians07 28
He sounds like a keeper. Bring him home to your parents, they'll really welcome him with closed fists.
Kaptainawesome 6
I feel like this should be the store clerks fml.
llamahatts 5
Seriously, you need to contact the police. I don't know how long it's been since you broke up (the first 2 weeks are the most dangerous), but he is obviously unstable. Next time there might not be a store clerk for him to punch and he'll take it out on you
rickyvil 11
so yall started dating again. right?
SmoothPancakes 10
Well, he'll get introduced to Bubba shortly.
sconline 5
It doesn't sound like you got the bad end of this... Poor clerk
metalhead88 9
Well hopefully the jackass will be in jail for a long time
justjeffo7 14
This requires pepper spray, a restraining order, and a follow up.
Ilsimen 2
2300+ psychotic exboyfriends think OP deserved it. SMH