By atomwolf - 09/12/2016 17:01 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, I wanted to work out the volume of my penis and did so on the first piece of paper I could find on my desk. After I finished the calculations I realized that the other side of the paper was in fact my school report. It's the only copy I have. FML
I agree, your life sucks 4 998
You deserved it 12 055

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You'd have to be so ******* bored/baked out of your mind to decide to find the volume of your penis.

YDI for putting something like that on a piece of paper without checking the other side first, especially since you'd (probably) recently done a school report in your work space.

Comments

You'd have to be so ******* bored/baked out of your mind to decide to find the volume of your penis.

I seriously thought at first that this was some sort of innuendo for jacking off, but #1 made me realize it wasn't :D

#15 because everyone knows the average penis is 25.4 cubic inches.

Well they do go hand in hand with each other.

To be honest, I was neither drunk, high or horny when I suddenly decided to figure out the volume and weight of my breasts. Merely impulsive and curious. If I was a boy, I could see myself do this.

YDI for putting something like that on a piece of paper without checking the other side first, especially since you'd (probably) recently done a school report in your work space.

Definitely YDI. If you want to calculate the volume... well okay, but why would you be so excited to do so that you wouldn't look at the paper you were using first?

volvagia720 6

Leave it on there. Pity points are always welcome

Could you not just photocopy the report?

They might not have a photocopier but that's a really good idea that I would never think of lol.

A really good eraser and white out are going to be your little friends to get rid of the math of your little friend.

In England, they call it a rubber. That would certainly prevent the Wite-Out from leaking on the page.

tantanpanda 26

or just change the variables and whatnot, unless OP wrote something like "PENIS CIRCUMFERENCE = X" which can't be changed easily if OP writes hard. Nobody really cares about some erased math on the back of a report as long as it's somewhat erased.

Hopefully, the school will appreciate your dedication to math. If they complain, show them the video where Neil DeGrasse Tyson calculates how many men a male prostitute must f*** to buy... something, I don't remember what.

im gonna say YDI, only because it'll only matter if you titled your calculations 'dimensions and volume of my phalus'. if you didnt, how will they know what the calculations were for

You deserve this one! Where was your brain that day?

A better way would have been water displacement- dipping it in a full container and measuring the water that overflowed... But you certainly got a LOL out of me. FYL indeed!

And I thought I would be the first one geeky enough to have thought of that. Or shameless enough to post it and risk people wondering if I was talking from experience.

I thought of that, too, and how awkward it would be to **** a cup... I mean, a vase, a large vase of water. Would I had to cuddle it afterwards?

That way you could also compare the volume in relation to the temperature of the water.

You may have noticed I'm female- clever though ; )