At least you made it through those years! You're still here and fought without a psychologist and I applaud you and your strength

I'm glad you're doing better OP. It's a shame your mom doesn't understand.

You've accomplished something so great, OP! But a lot of times others don't really understand our feelings. She may think you're being fake happy to hide your previous thoughts? I don't know.

a psychologist might just be good for someone to talk to, but glad you're doing better op!

She sounds so clueless..

I think it would be good to take her up on that offer. Just because you are handling things right now doesn't mean that therapy is unnecessary. You've gone through some tough stuff and it may be good to talk that through. And just because you don't want to kill yourself right now doesn't mean you're necessarily happy with life or doing great either; maybe a therapist can help you get to an even better & happier spot then you are now. Plus, if for some reason you were to ever relapse (which I hope never happens) you would already have access to someone that can help and already knows you well. And I'm sure you'd like to vent about mom anyways. ;) Good luck op!

I'm sorry you didn't get the help you needed when you asked for it OP. Depression is hard. Much respect to you for finding the light in your life again. :)

As much as I'd like to rage against the OP's mother for not taking her suicidal daughter to get help when she asked for it, I can't help but feel we need more details first... For one, what if she honestly couldn't afford it? I've never been to any South African countries, but I know at least in the U.S. that the mental health care system for youth and adults are virtually non existent. If you're not an immediate threat to anything your condition may as well not exist and SOME organizations that can provide financial support will do anything to save money, from releasing someone unstable to having a child go into residency across the country, even if the family can't move to be with them. What I'm saying is that the mother might not have had any money to spare despite wanting to get OP help, and maybe she's more financially secure and decided to do something when she felt concerned again. Then again, I've been known to give the benefit of the doubt to those who didn't deserve it.

I understand all too much. I agreed to go see a therapist at the tail end of 17, and my mothers reaction? Give it a few months so I can do it on my own. I agreed because I thought I'd be getting her help, and it never got done. And I've since come to realize it wouldn't really have made a difference anyway: The issue was the environment, go figure. (This has convergent validation from a sibling of mine that moved out.)

I can feel your pain OP. I was suffering from depression couple years back and my parents didn't understand it too. And now I'm total fucked up and went to a psychiatrist by myself.