Today, my idiot neighbor decided the best way to dispose of the poison ivy in his yard was to pile it all up and burn it. I'm severely allergic. It was so bad that one of my eyes is still swollen half shut. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I woke up with a rash all across my body. Last night, my boyfriend and I got it on in some bushes, and it seems one of those was poison ivy. FML
Today, I took a piss while doing yard work. Later, to my horror, I discovered that I had touched poison oak at some point. My penis is now blistered and swollen. FML
Today, months after a severe poison ivy rash, I have learned that I now have a very intense poison ivy allergy. As in, any exposure to poison ivy at all will cause my face, hands, thighs, and groin to swell up and itch madly for up to a week. FML
Today, I got the worst sunburn I've ever had in my life, and then discovered I'm allergic to aloe when I went to treat the burn with some gel. FML
Today, an idiot decided it would be fun to light up a firecracker in front of our house. It ended with firetrucks, a black yard, and yet somehow the weeds survived. FML
Today, after spending three hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML
Today, I went to the store and bought some cream to help with a sunburn I'd gotten a few days ago. What's worse than having red, peeling, and painful skin? An allergic reaction on top of it. FML
Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML
Today, my Mom and I found out that we're allergic to the wood my Dad has been making fires with. She can't see, I can't breathe. FML
Today, I found out I'm allergic to bug repellent. So instead of having a couple of itchy bug bites, my skin feels like it's on fire and is violently itchy everywhere the repellent has touched. FML
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Top comments
senor_octubre 24
Don't say half shut. Think of it like glass half full so in this case your eyes are half open. Boom. The powers of optimism.
Kermy1113 23
I hope you're okay! And that it's not a deadly allergy..
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Comments (59)
FweakofCydonia 40
Your neighbour is scary: that sort of thing could eventually kill you! As a sufferer from anaphylaxis (basically life-threatening allergies), I carry around an Epipen. It's not a cure, but it does allow the symptoms to disappear for 10-20 minutes (just enough time to get admitted to a hospital).
BlackHawkSavior 28
I guess you didn't see that one coming Sorry
Ambitiousmould 8
Do you not have green bins in the US?
zeffra13 31
Something like that actually shouldn't go in the green bin, because green bin material is composted and then commercially sold, and you don't want the oils in the compost. You shouldn't put weeds in the green bin either, because it'll spread their seeds to however buys it.
MATsam12 2
you should have caked 911 and made it seem worse, gone to the hospital. It was inflicted by the neighbor so the police would have been brought in. he would have been charged with assault and public endangerment.
ThrottleJockey 36
OP may live in an area that permits burning. Also, I don't think you can charge him with assault with a weed.
ThrottleJockey 36
I'd tell you to sue him but I doubt that you'd see half of it.
antisolid87 5
OP's case aside his neighbor should know better than to burn that stuff. Illegal or not, sounds like OP's neighbor is one that needs all those warning labels like "caution hot" on a oven etc. CDC states to not burn the plants though common sense has told me not to, to begin with. FYL
RememberSchlitz 9
Perhaps you can get him to plant a less offensive weed in its place?
moondoglou420 17
Have you tried seeing the situation from his perspective? Oh.. Sorry...
kowsee 22
Doubt he thought you were allergic but maybe tell him for the next time :)
acmariner99 25
Habanero oil on the doorknobs. And poison ivy (if you can do it without aggravating your allergy) on the toilet seat