Today, my husband's car was stolen from our driveway while he was out jogging. We'd recently had a huge fight, and he accused me of having done this to get revenge. I was at work all day, but it seems this doesn't make any difference to his dumb, paranoid ass. FML
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By
AmethystRain
| 20
You should counter-accuse him of doing it himself in an attempt to frame you, then settle it with a sword fight in the front yard.
By
tylersign
| 11
Ok, the deed is done. Where's my money?
COMMENTS
By
karkid619
| 8
What a dumbass.
Reply
Tadeusz_fml
| 5
I smell a divorce.
Wait, false alarm, it's pie. Which is good. Pie > divorce.
Wait, false alarm, it's pie. Which is good. Pie > divorce.
Reply
MagicallyFat
| 12
Trust is such an important thing in a relationship that and the knowledge of hot wiring cars apparently
Reply
SemperFi_23
| 6
Schizophrenia perhaps?
Reply
flockz
| 19
tell him he shouldn't be running away from his problems.
Reply
LiveLaughFML
| 10
I'm not pointing any fingers here but isn't it ironic how this happened around the time you and your husband were fighting? Also, wouldn't you have a spare key to his car in the house so you could back it out of the driveway and hide it somewhere? Something smells fishy! ;-)
Reply
megan_lovee
| 0
ooh #1 yur hot pm mee
Reply
Caramelox
| 3
It's his problem for not believing the situation.
Reply
ntherewas1
| 11
I agree. Married couples really work as a sort of composite entity, so harm to one half is really harm to both people.
Reply
n_epic_fail
| 14
This is when you leave his sorry ass and take half of everything... But you know that's just an idea.
Reply
Iffyy
| 6
93 - unless they signed a pre-nup..
Reply
fmlrightnowww
| 11
Op is a liar!!! Singapore has the lowest crime rate in the world and I'm sure if a car was stolen it would be in the news by now if this post is real..
By
andrew145
| 3
That's nasty
Reply
futtbuck101
| 1
A dumb and paranoid ass can be quite nasty.
Reply
flockz
| 19
ya never knowing where to shit, always skeptical of the toilet paper, nervous that toilets are following him...
By
tylersign
| 11
Ok, the deed is done. Where's my money?
By
peptidoglycan
| 4
He's stupid. If you stole it wouldn't you keep it at your house? So it should still be sitting in the driveway.
Reply
EwanSmith
| 2
what? how little imagination do you have?
Reply
SadinSherman
| 16
Why would she steal his car and keep in the driveway,which is probably the first place he will look if they don't have a garage.
Reply
SinfulTragedy
| 19
Hey now, judging by 5's picture, he/she is only a little baby!
Reply
karkid619
| 8
If she stole it and kept it in the driveway then I'm pretty sure that's not stealing if it's still on their property.
By
StopDropNRoll
| 11
I hear a divorce around the corner unfortunately :(
Reply
Portalcc
| 4
You don't just get a divorce because of a fight.
Reply
Jaxx66
| 21
If he's already playing the blame game, yes you do.
Reply
ironwords
| 8
Well 60 when I got in one fight my
Mom sent me to live with my aunt and uncle in California. Why is this so different?
Mom sent me to live with my aunt and uncle in California. Why is this so different?
Reply
xGraycloud
| 4
You and your mom aren't married nor promised to spend the rest of your lives with each other?
Reply
ClassyCommando
| 13
Really? I was sent to my aunt and uncle in Bel Air, despite the fact that I only got in one little fight, which frightened my mother.
Reply
shitidied
| 17
THE REFERENCES ARE EXTREME HERE
By
EwanSmith
| 2
you're very convincing
By
The_creator_fml
| 2
Ya because stealing his car would benifit you... Now you probably have to drive him everywhere. He's dumb.
By
TimysterGates
| 15
ah, you sound so in love.
By
loserman67
| 35
"His dumb, paranoid ass." Sounds like your relationship is going nicely. I side with your hubby, you sound like the type to do just this very thing. It's funny that it happened just as he was out jogging. almost like someone knew when he would be away for awhile. Here's what you do, give him his car back and then pack up yours and get the hell out if things are that bad.
Reply
Ins0mau
| 20
Why would she bother lying about this to a bunch of strangers?
Reply
stephanieeDawnx
| 0
If she was at work all day, how could she have done it? Ya know, people DO have jobs. I think it would be more realistic that she was at work, than that she would steal his car, when, as pointed out above, she would probably be the one to have to drive him around, now.
How about we use some common sense?
How about we use some common sense?
Reply
nissanman_fml
| 16
Yes, obviously the OP didn't do it, 52, but your logic is fairly flawed in coming to that conclusion. Your argument about having a job carries little weight; if I was hell-bent on revenge, I wouldn't hesitate to call in sick to work and then carry out my revenge. The OP's husband has no idea whether his wife was at work or not, and her word probably doesn't count for much in the current state of their relationship.
As for the argument that she would have to drive him around, yeah that's a valid point, but in making that argument, you might be giving the OP more credit than is due. When people are pissed off, common sense usually goes out the window, so you couldn't really expect the OP to properly weigh the consequences of what might happen and the possible outcomes of her stealing his car. So that explanation goes out the window as well. How about you use some common sense, 52?
As for the argument that she would have to drive him around, yeah that's a valid point, but in making that argument, you might be giving the OP more credit than is due. When people are pissed off, common sense usually goes out the window, so you couldn't really expect the OP to properly weigh the consequences of what might happen and the possible outcomes of her stealing his car. So that explanation goes out the window as well. How about you use some common sense, 52?
Reply
Jdeluxh
| 12
66- Finally a logical person on here. 43- I have actually contemplated posting an FML if I ever decided to commit a crime. Many people would follow the same thought pattern as you, and believe I was telling the truth.
Reply
brettlovesgirls
| 4
Why are we all getting worked up on it? Big words aren't gonna help anybody. It's an FML and it was posted to bring humor/ lessen someone's bad mood by telling that certain person that they're not alone.
By
Monkeysmommy1
| 0
Take the insurance money from the theft and hire a divorce lawyer. What a dumbass