By Anonyme - 26/09/2014 06:56 - France - Saint-di

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML
I agree, your life sucks 545
You deserved it 64

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Soft kitty, Warm kitty, Little ball of fur. Happy kitty, Sleepy kitty, You're such a whore.

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Yeah I didn't see that coming, as most I thought they his daughter. Talk about read it through first right? lol

It was wild start to finish

I almost thought that he named his human daughter Pussy for a second... oh god.

I still think naming a cat Pussy is a bit funny. That's like naming something by its own nickname :P Here kitty kitty kitty... Yes her name is kitty

OP should've spayed their cat! Especially before letting the cat outside. I really dislike incompetent cat owners who are contributing to the cat overpopulation problem.

then you must love masutrbaters, since each time they do their thing, God (supposedly) kills an unwanted kitten.

If you want your cat to have kittens and you are going to look after those kittens then I don't really see what the problem is! My cat has had kittens and the ones we didn't keep went to loving homes where they are well looked after.

#154 maybe they were thinking about it, and the cat got out beforehand. Or maybe at some point they wanted kittens, I wouldn't necessarily go out of my way to call someone a "incompetent" cat owner unless I knew the entire story to it. Oh well, maybe I don't like people that judge just as much as you don't like incompetent people.

#154 how can there be a cat overpopulation? If any thing there is a human overpopulation. There's 8 billion of us.

because we are overpopulated and we breed fucking loads of cats I think it's really irresponsible to keep breeding animals when there are so many in rescues tbh even if I did and they all went to good homes I couldn't live with myself knowing I had brought them in to the world just so I could sell them off to strangers

Didn't expect that, sorry OP.

At least OP knows that if/when she gets a baby girl OP's husband will be protective!

I LOVE the way you wrote this. Its was genius!

Meant to thumb up this. didn't happen. ...

salvorican 24

Its was indeed.

not many people are have the talent to write like this.

Okay.

That's all you could come up with?

Soft kitty, Warm kitty, Little ball of fur. Happy kitty, Sleepy kitty, You're such a whore.

This made me laugh till I cried.

LOL! This comment is purrfect!

MLardinos 14

I love it.

You sir are amazing for typing this

Thank you for the laugh XD

I wish I could like this twice.

I love this comment. Totally awesome!

BAZINGA to you, Sir!

#7, Holy shit... Now my keyboard is covered with coffee... And my nose burns...

Can't get over the fact that you named your cat "Pussy".

right. whatever happened to names like mittens or fluffy? lol

This FML is actually translated from the French version. The cat's name was less connoted, if I recall, in the original one.

My cats names were Fido, Spot, Rover, Spike, Bowser, and a black kitty named Snowball. When i gave away my kittens, the babies were renamed. :-/

Did you stop to consider that OP posted this in French?

iAmPaul 49

11 - Haha, one of my cats is called Mittens, and a cat I used to have (he died since) was called Fluffy.

I don't think translation matters for names.

#82 why would anyone even think of that? and to whoever translated this, why not use Kitty?

knoxxx 22

@123 there are absolutely different translations when it comes to names. Not always, but it definitely occurs. How do you think people translate names that are spelt in non-latin alphabets (Like Mandarin or Russian) into languages that do use the Latin alphabet (english)?

My neighbors cat is mittens

FYL, but in a very twisted way, it's kinda cute!

Directed by M Night Shyamalan.

Shyamalans twists stopped being this good... Ever.

Kallian_fml 21

You just can't control cats. If they want kittens, they get them. My cats been 'fixed' but that still didn't stop her from stealing the neighbours kittens twice now.

ShadowlessSpear 21

How does that happen?

Kallian_fml 21

Well, the second time my neighbour said she saw my cat jump out of her window carrying one of her kittens. I found my cat in my bedroom guarding them very ferociously. I'm not sure what possessed her to do such a thing...

I think she's mad at you for fixing her. Not to say you weren't being a responsible pet owner.... But damn!

It's a cat thing. Often if a breeder has multiple breeding mamas at a time, they will steal each others kittens. Regardless of if they have a current litter or not.

Isn't it peculiar, the term "fixing?" I mean, you aren't fixing the cat, if anything you are breaking it. ;p

I watched a documentary on feral cats once, the cat queen and one of her daughters both had litters at the same time and since daughter cat never had babies before, she picked possibly the worst nest possible. she ended up leaving the babies unattended to guard from tomcats (who kill their sons to lower the competition) and gramma cat snuck in, kidnapped the baby kitties and cared for both litters until mommy cat showed up again. They then shared the nest and worked together to nurse the kitties, the end.

Kallian_fml 21

#108 Well, I would have said spayed or neutered. But I couldn't remember if you spay or neuter a female cat, and I couldn't be bothered to look it up.

Spay = Female Neuter = Male

You can't spell neuter without nut. That's how I remember.

After I read kittens... I had to re read it again !!

I found it quite weird after reading the first bit and the FML being in the animals section.. Guess I just had to wait till the end