Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
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Today, my hamster had babies. I came home just in time to witness her kick the mutilated bodies of her two babies out of her house, then crawl back in and go to sleep. Now my sister refuses to touch her and calls her a "baby-eating demon." FML
Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML
Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML
Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
Today, my mom wanted to surprise me by buying me a hamster. When I got into her car, I was actually surprised and even said, "Hi" to the hamster. When we got home, the hamster was dead. FML
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
Today, I found out my creepy, obsessive neighbor got a pet hamster and named it after me. He has been telling all sorts of stories about his hamster using my name, and he just told me in detail how it died of heart attack. FML
Today, my kittens hunted and killed their first prey. My hamster. FML
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Top comments
Goobian 3
Today I was born, and this strange creature towered over my mother and my siblings, and touched one of my siblings. Later my mother decided to eat the sibling that the creature touched. Now I am terrified of being petted. FML
Bumlove89 0
I'm sorry to hear that. I honestly didn't know that fact either. I don't blame you because you didn't know and therefore didn't purposely do it.
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Comments (232)
ElsBells 0
That wasn't even funny. Just horribly depressing and a little disturbing.
SammiixSue 13
You are a moron. Why didn't you read about hamsters BEFORE you got one and had it get pregnant?! You SERIOUSLY deserved that. But that poor baby hamster didn't. ='(
valuemeal2 1
This is sad, but it also made me LOL. I had no idea hamsters did that (we've never had one, only cats) so it would have been a shock to me. That sucks, but probably there are 50 more in the litter, right?
lobstar 0
I feel bad that the baby hamster had to pay with its life for your idiocy. Maybe next time take 5 minutes to learn about the animals you'll be raising.
nO__namE 0
Today, this stupid bitch touched me and I died. FML
dizzzane 0
here's a story just as entertaining... this morning, i woke up with a jumpy. i touched myself to relieve it. i semened on my sheets. i had to do the laundry.
so1337 0
that's awesome! it makes me want to get a pregnant hamster, just so i can mess with its babies. F their lives!
xXMILKYCHUNKSXx 0
Wow... I never knew that. Congrats there, Hamster Slaughterer.
l33tm0nk3y 0
Yeah, for future reference it's generally not a good idea to touch baby animals, period, unless they're already separated from the mother or you're told otherwise by an expert.
pearls 0
why is this such a big deal, I agree with everything #27 says. hamsters are like £4, we had some and the pet shop owner lied about them being male and female. it just happens. I don't get why everyone's like OMGGGGG BEFORE YOU BREED YOUR ANIMAL DO YOUR RESEARCH, if it was a dog it would be a little different because they're more domestic and you know if they're male and female, but a hamster? really?! I laughed out loud at the hamster slaughterer bit though, and I never laugh at FMLs lately.