Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML
Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML
Today, the water in my shower wouldn't drain so I used a snake to unclog it. I pulled almost a full foot of nasty hair and gunk out of the drain. I just moved in, and the previous owner was an elderly woman. I just pulled a foot of old lady pubes out of my drain. FML
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We've had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML
Today, I realized that the "eyelash curling brush" that my best friend found in my old bathroom drawer was actually a stick used for cleaning food out of my sister's braces. I used that thing for years. FML
Today, at work, the only toilet in the building was so clogged that it was overflowing. We didn't have a plunger, so basically the only way to stop it was to try and reach in and remove the blockage. I was nominated to do it. FML
Today, my friend was extremely constipated when he used my toilet. I'm now having to go buy a new toothbrush, because he used mine to dig out his shit. FML
Today, I had no choice but to unclog a toilet with my bare hands. FML
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Top comments
SS99_fml 20
I'm not sure if this is a hairy situation or a shitty one....
dinosxxrawr 22
I'm amazed she successfully unclogged a toilet with a hairbrush. cool points for her.
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Comments (80)
pastispast 7
hopefully your mom and your gf are on good terms before she explains the shitty situation.
Axel5238 29
Why does your 5 year old think a cat would flush? Have you guys been leaving ***** in the toilet the size of house cats?
NeinKittenz 20
Confused commenter is confused.
TheShadyMilkman 15
Sounds like your mom will be having a shitty hair day...
katties 27
I just can't stop myself from thinking your girlfriend is a dumb bitch. It might be that it's because I have ONE hairbrush, that has served me over 10 years and still has many years to serve. It also wasn't cheap... + something about using hell'a lot of toilet paper + there are many other ways to unclog a toilet + is she really so scared about someone finding out about the clogged toilet that she would rather ruin property? And back to point one.
sugarshane007 20
Your girlfriend was being thoughtful. Your mom probably mentioned wanting to dye her hair, and there really is only one way to capture the essence of the 'Shit Brown' shade.
_DudeGuy_ 16
I bet this put a clog in their relationship. In all seriousness, just buy your mom a new brush.
Dave_Davington 35
Your girlfriend must produce some monster *****.
SrakaSrakasta 20
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI for living in America, where you obviously have no idea how toilets and plumbing are supposed to work. I have literally NEVER heard of anyone who clogged the toilet just by taking a shit in any normal country.
superpoptart 24
Why thank you for your narrow minded, prejudiced, condescending slurs.
TheShadyMilkman 15
#28 ... I think you pretty much nailed it...
JanisEvans 10
Sorry to burst your bubble, but this happens all over the world.
Zebediabolical 45
Clearly you have never experienced Saturday night post-drinking Taco Bell.
purebliss_fml 19
I'm pretty sure she should have wrote the FML in this situation... "Today, I was desperate to take a shit at my boyfriends house. I couldn't hold it in so I went to the bathroom and completely demolished the toilet bowl. To make matters worse, I had to use my boyfriends mother's hairbrush to unclog the monstrosity that was stopping me from flushing. FML"
Ypetrol 11
How does she even do that?
TheShadyMilkman 15
#30, I am certain there was a good bit of grunting and maybe even some straining but I am willing to bet it was all done carefully...