Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me so she could "let her life flow in the direction she wants." Apparently that includes smoking, stealing, and making out with other girls at parties. The best part? She wants to get back together "after she matures and gets it out of her system." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I broke up with the girl I'd been dating for two months because she started smoking. This is a deal breaker for me. I just found out from her friend that she started smoking for the sole purpose of getting me to break it off and now plans to quit. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. She wants to try dating women. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of three years dumped me because my refusal to go out drinking or get wasted at parties with her makes me "too boring". Thing is, I'm a recovering alcoholic. I'm over one year sober and I don't want to risk relapsing again, yet she expects me to choose between my health and her idea of fun. FML
Today, my girlfriend got drunk and started crying, begging me to never break up with her, only for her to say 10 minutes later, "I don’t wanna be with you anymore." Then she asked me if she could buy me some pot, and, "Let’s watch movies." FML
Today, my girlfriend of 8 months and I broke up. We decided to give back everything we ever bought for each other. I gave her the stuff she bought me and when I asked for my stuff she said she'd sold it and spent the money on herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML
Today, a girl I was dating broke up with me for her previous fling. She was scared of committing to a relationship, even though she ended it with him for me. But now she would rather be with this other guy in secret, who is married, and has no plans on being with her for long term. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because her father, who abandoned her before she was born and just reentered her life, doesn't approve. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that we should take a break from our relationship, because it'd be best for the both of us. Later, I found out that she really meant it'd be best for her and her new boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
popatia 0
LOL Do the same thing and see if she still wants you back :P
lostfaithinpppl 19
OP, I hope you didn't agree to patiently wait for her until "she matures"
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Comments (81)
Chopperman_fml 0
Flow your life in the opposite direction, OP. She isn't worth waiting for.
Six_and_the_Moon 3
If she thinks that you will simply wait around while she indulges in selfish hedonism, until *she* decides that she's had enough, she doesn't actually care about you. If she is willing to risk losing you forever because she wants to go be a party *****, she doesn't actually care about you. If she was willing to assume that you would still be there after she 'matures', she doesn't actually care about you. She must have one hell of an ego to think she is worthy of you putting up with this bullshit. Leave her to her adolescent partying, and the karmic awakening she is going to have when she realises what a ****-up she has made of things. Move on. She's not worth it, and she needs to learn this.
jonny2x4 0
She must be a freak in the sheets. Clearly she is hot.
Icarus3 0
Ok, here's your game plan: while she's going around acting like it's totally bad-ass to have the maturity level of a 13-year-old, you find a woman who actually deserves your respect and devotion. Then when she comes crawling back to you (most likely bringing a case of herpes along with her), you laugh in her face.
DameGreyWulf 1
I like this plan. It's magically delicious.
rick_james_b17ch 0
suggest maybe doing other things in her face as well
DeathShad0 1
She sounds absolutely scummy. Congratulations on dodging a bullet there.
gazzasyd 0
its just a phase, grow a pair and enjoy the lesbian action whilst you can.
literalmanchild 0
oh come on, what did you expect if you decided to date a 14 year old if she's somehow not 14 then that sucks that your girlfriend's puberty was apparently stunted for several years you probably shouldn't take her back though since making out with a shit ton of girls like that sounds like putting yourself on the fast track to herpes
Relentless113 0
make a deal with her, buy her pot, and ask to join in on the lesbian action.. if that works out you will hav the best life ever!
COBRAMORPH 0
I agree with #41. Then dump the **** when you can find something better.
daboodidaboodi 0
Haha you guys are all taking this too seriously. Go have fun. Frolic in the single world while she does the same, if you two end up meeting again, go for it. Idk. You all act like she's on meth and a prostitute.