Today, my girlfriend decided to invite her best friend over for a threesome. This would've been the best day ever, had I not been at work while it was taking place. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend and her best friend came home after a long night. They both hopped into the bed and were very insistent that I join them. I said I felt weird about it and slept on the couch. The next morning, my pissed off girlfriend said that they wanted a threesome but I killed the mood. Fuck, I'm an idiot. FML
Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML
Today, I had threesome with my wife and her best friend. Now my wife is mad at me for sleeping with her best friend. FML
Today, an ex of mine told me she wanted a threesome. This was great until I realised I wasn't included. FML
Today, my best friend asked if I'd join him and his girlfriend for a 3-way. Since I've always had a crush on his girlfriend, I eagerly agreed. When I got there, I learned that their idea of a 3-way was them watching me jerk off while I watched them have sex. FML
Today, the guy I've been seeing asked me to have a threesome. With his girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend's best friend started coming on to me. I was appalled, and told her she was a terrible friend. My girlfriend jumped out of nowhere and started crying. Apparently, her kink is watching her best friend and boyfriend fuck, and she's now mad I didn't go for it. What the fuck? FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to visit me at work. With another girl. FML
Today, I finally agreed to the threesome that my husband has been trying to persuade me to have. We arranged it with my hot best friend, thinking I would be more comfortable with her. I ended up lying naked beside them, watching them have fun. FML
Today, my wife wanted to have a threesome. During our honeymoon. With the maid of honor. I didn't sign up for this. FML
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Top comments
nchov523 11
I don't know... To me, it seems that if you truly loved your girlfriend, you wouldn't e very eager to involve another person in your lovemaking. But maybe it's just me.
MrsPegg 45
EX girlfriend, right?
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Comments (113)
TourettesGuyFTW 26
=-O Noor!!!
allia118 11
Yikes, like previous comments, hope she's an ex now.
flutter4 7
In Howard's mom's voice " go back to Babalan you *****"
xFaust_fml 12
That would be Babylon...
flutter4 7
I never said I got an A+ in spelling. Just here trying to have fun.
ositoakaluis 16
this is a good reason to set up nanny cams, one you set them up and catch the cheater on the act you can upload it on myexgirlfriend.com
ICastillo 25
Oh that's sucks that you missed out on a threesome man... Oh yeah and your girlfriend is a ***** bag.
ebonyirony 29
that sucks. I mean. she sucked. yknow ;)
DocBastard 40
I think this might be the first FML where a "threesome! " comment won't be possible.
zombiekitten87 12
I am of the opinion that to certain people, having a threesome is tantamount to declaring an open relationship. Personally, I don't think a healthy relationship requires a third person, but hey... It's your life.
olpally 33
Oh buddy... Never talk to her again, that *****. You may have 99 problems, but that bitch isn't one anymore... I hope.
dangousity 21
Kick her our the door ... Goodbye
perdix 31
My math is screwed up. Girlfriend + best friend = twosome. Did the two of them gang up on some unmentioned guy, or did they have a lesbian tryst while including the OP in spirit only? Or was the best friend a guy? It still seems that two people were having sex. Help?
xFaust_fml 12
Yeah, it's not very clear. The way it's written, it just seems like the girlfriend wanted to have a threesome, but OP wasn't there and a) it just fell through (but I'm guessing it's not what happened, since they could've just rescheduled) b) they decided that they didn't need him after all, hence some girl-on-girl action (smart decision if you ask me, but I might be biased (: ) If OP wasn't to be a part of the threesome from the start, mentioning the actual third person in the FML might have been a good idea. Because this is just really confusing.
PrincessPesa 20
Maybe Mr. Double-Ended ***** joined the party, that dirty bastard. What he lacks in personality he makes up for in reliability! They call, he comes. Or...they come? I'm grasping at straws here. Maybe it's 2 girls+ one male Real Doll? Which would take it to a whole other ******* level of weird but could also make for great post-breakup shit talking material (to ensure her future suitors know about her triflin' ways)! Damned cryptic-ass FML making my warped mind run wild!
CallMeMcFeelii 14
45 your comment made me think of Requiem for a Dream. "Ass to ass!"
TheMathMajor 26
It's okay perdix, contrary to popular belief, 1 plus 1 actually equals 3
PrincessPesa 20
And 2+2 always makes five. If Tom Yorke says it, it must be true.