By BadBribe - 24/06/2009 19:15 - United States

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML
I agree, your life sucks 53 113
You deserved it 30 169
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Top comments

genius_man16 0

She was the one who wanted to bribe you. WTF is her problem?

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Comments

Shrappy 0

That was totally unnecessary on her part.

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truthbetoldxx 0

That is completely out-of-line, hun. She should expect that..or just not wear a dress at all. It's her problem & she's a bitch for doing that.

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QDogg119 0

LEAVE HER! COMPLETE LACK OF RESPECT FOR YOU!!! LEAVE HER!

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hypermusic720 0

you have no way to control where that stuff goes. the pleasure keeps going and unless you stop that, you can't control it. I say the girl is a bitch for not just swallowing.

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BobTailKittens 0

haha. bitch shoulda swallowed.

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Ambitious 0

Okay, so it was wrong...VERY wrong she got him in the nuts and she shouldn'y of been wearing a dress. But all you people (probably guys) saying she shoulda swallowed, how would you like be be in that possition? How would you like to swallow cum? Oh yeah and 'cum' usually means ****, where as 'came' means to come AKA ******!

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xFenix81x 0

That is when you get up and punch her in the face. Hard.

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justanotherhuman 21

ehhhh. I'm would like to clarify some things. First, this sounds like poor planning on both of your behalves. Second, straight up physical assault against the SO is *never* legit unless you're literally in immediate physical danger resulting from their behavior/actions. Technically, in the much-vaunted nutpunch-tigerstrike fashion, your girlfriend has just completed an act of domestic violence against you. There are laws against that... not to mention it's just an asshole thing to do, aiming for the genitals. Third, it's 'came'. Fourth, swallowing- this one's simple. It boils down to whether you're a sweets person or a salty person. It's a matter of personal preference, extenuating circumstances notwithstanding; not to mention waaaaay off topic from the OP's contention. Fifth, let's just reiterate that it really sounds like poor logistical planning on both parties' behalves. It couldn't have waited until *after* the dinner? Or maybe *before* they were/she was dressed up and ready to go? I guess FYL *because* YDI.

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justanotherhuman 21

addendum: not YDI on the nutpunch. YDI because the whole equation was unstable from the get-go.

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petebrickette 0

Here, you're talking out of your arse. How are they both to blame? As a guy, if your girlfriend decides to give you a ******* you're hardly going to turn it down. And when you're coming it's pretty intense. The responsibility lies with the girl to have the presence of mind to, at the very least, keep the ******* **** away from her dress. Poor guy. No justification for punching him in the balls. Proooobably shouldn't press charges against his girlfriend though. You sap.

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