Miscellaneous: Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero,...

By Coldsnap - 12/08/2011 17:25 - Sweden

Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 837

You deserved it 5 013

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Same thing different taste

Hot Hot Hot

By Cliff - 13/02/2022 16:00

Today, I nearly burnt a hole in my esophagus because I couldn’t stand my dad’s taunts about me not being able to stomach ghost pepper hot sauce. Irony is a cruel bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 1 093

By Autocorrected - 26/11/2012 20:13 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 461

You deserved it 3 375

Was it worth it?

By Anonymous - 05/09/2023 00:02

Today, I had a stomach bug, but despite it I swallowed a mouthful of habanero sauce on a dare. I ended up projectile vomiting on a wall outside, lost my sense of balance and fell over on the sidewalk, almost blacked out from the tightness in my chest, and had to refuse an ambulance that somebody had called. All for $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 1 238

Zero stars on Trip Advisor

By Anonymous - 01/03/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I have an awful stomach virus. I can only drink liquids and can't eat anything solid, especially anything spicy. My dad forced me to eat the fajitas he'd made for dinner and screamed at me when I told him I couldn't, then screamed at me again for "wasting food" when I predictably threw up all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 82

By DMStarsky - 21/10/2011 17:19 - United States

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 579

You deserved it 4 691

By green and not with envy - 13/06/2014 20:17 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 773

You deserved it 5 797

By Anonymous - 26/09/2013 16:19 - United States - East Hampton

Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede, placed it on his tongue, and then swallowed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 749

You deserved it 3 608

By my bravado's gonna kill me one day - 10/08/2018 13:00

Today, as a big fan of spicy food and a huge challenge seeker, I decided to try the hottest burger I could order. Despite being warned by a waitress, I went for it. After eating a third, I had trouble breathing from the spiciness. The waitress was smirking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 3 874

By ILiveWithMorons - 12/04/2011 03:07 - United States

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 389

You deserved it 3 342

By Alec - 15/06/2011 09:02 - United States

Today, I had a sore throat, and I'd read that drops of Tabasco sauce on your tongue helps. I aimed the bottle at my tongue and the whole cap came off, covering my face and filling my mouth with Tabasco sauce, causing me to blow chunks all over the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 016

You deserved it 38 195

unluckiestperson_fml 14

Friday 12 August 2011 23:19

With a name like "Tasmanian habanero", I'd steer clear.

iluvboobies 9

Friday 12 August 2011 23:18

tough shit

Comments

DriizztD 0

Saturday 13 August 2011 3:50

Theres nothing hot about Tasmanians. Let me assure you

sheethapins 13

Saturday 13 August 2011 3:57

Hot damn.

neongurl98 10

Saturday 13 August 2011 4:10

Even if it was just another pepper why on earth would you still eat it?

Anupants 0

Saturday 13 August 2011 5:03

Xbox isn't the only thing that gets the red ring of death...

datguyuno 5

Saturday 13 August 2011 5:18

Burning assholes suck!

russianspy1234 11

Saturday 13 August 2011 6:12

if it burns going in itll burn coming out

EarAcheMyEYE10 2

Saturday 13 August 2011 8:17

I hope you dropped that shitty load on that assholes pillow!! better yet, clean yourself up using his toothbrush!!

maddiester 5

Saturday 13 August 2011 8:34

did anyone else notice how it says 'today' and the next day was mentioned too?

cmac86 23

Saturday 13 August 2011 8:36

Your dad is one heck of a troll!

rbkhockey33 0

Saturday 13 August 2011 9:10

the burning in your mouth got worse when you took a shit?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I’m coming to accept that my wife’s relationship with her phone and her social media is deeper and more intimate than it will ever be with me. I can’t afford to leave her, her sister's a lawyer, she’ll take everything I still love in the divorce. I hate my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 105

Today, one of my roommates blew a fuse by running a personal heater on full overnight. I notified our landlady that I had to get a new fuse; she came over to pay me for it. Only as I heard landlady's horn did I see another roommate's girlfriend's car; she stayed overnight and isn't allowed to. Both roomies got evicted and blamed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 91

The Top

Today, I took my girlfriend to get her nails done, gave her 500 spending money, took her to eat, bought her son a TV, then bought her clothes. We get to her house, she steps inside then gets furious her son had made a mess and hadn't cleaned his room. She told me to take the TV back, which I did, then got reamed for doing so. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 270

Today, my dad made me stick my gut out and walk around awkwardly, just so I'd look pregnant and let him get away with parking in an "expectant mothers" parking spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 613

You deserved it 4 882

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 076

You deserved it 2 238

You can do it!

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 78

Today, while watching YouTube, I was drinking when something funny happened. I laughed, choked, and threw up all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 587

You deserved it 246

Today, I get to see my boyfriend again after a month. So I decided to shave my pubic hair in the shape of a heart. After my little striptease, he gasped in admiration "Aaaw, Batman sign!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 193

You deserved it 16 121

Same thing different taste

Hot Hot Hot

Was it worth it?

Zero stars on Trip Advisor

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