Animals: Today, my dog thought it would be a good idea to use my phone...

By Cedar Buero - 05/03/2017 19:00 - United States - Cape Girardeau

Today, my dog thought it would be a good idea to use my phone as a chew toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 403

You deserved it 685

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 15/04/2015 17:18 - United States - Birmingham

Today, a few weeks after teaching my dog to fetch my phone and drop it in my lap, he decided to do it spontaneously. Too bad I was in the bath at the time. There goes a $300 phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 207

You deserved it 21 381

By toadface - 04/08/2009 23:25 - United States

Today, I took my puppy outside to play. At one point, she stopped chewing on her toy and ran over to give me a big kiss all over my face and mouth. A few minutes later I realized that her chew toy was actually the dried up carcass of a toad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 519

You deserved it 7 984

By jessica071509 - 24/04/2012 05:42 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 345

You deserved it 3 699

By dog got ur phone - 07/05/2017 02:00

Today, I was playing music from my phone, which was on the couch. I guess my dog got jealous, because she picked it up and ran over to the toilet, promptly dropping it right in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 004

You deserved it 738

By Anonymous - 14/11/2011 05:09 - United States

Today, I found pictures in my boyfriend's phone of our dog eating treats out of my mouth while I'm sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 297

You deserved it 4 657

Argument ender

By Anonymous - 14/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I was arguing with my girlfriend when my dog brought me a squeaky toy and tried shoving it into my hand so I could throw it for him. Out of habit, I grabbed it, but then it squeaked every time I tried to make a serious point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 113

You deserved it 410

By Anonymous - 26/09/2014 19:44 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my dog got so excited about a new toy that she vomited all over it. I had to clean up the vomit, throw away the toy, and now have a very sad dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 903

You deserved it 4 519

By peanuts - 03/07/2010 04:04 - United States

Today, my dog is mad at me due to the fact that earlier in the day I ate 2 peanut butter cookies. Apparently, they were his dog treats. I had no idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 192

You deserved it 36 141

Ungrateful doggo

By Oww - 20/01/2023 19:00 - United States

Today, my dog was trying to chew on his bone, but he kept losing it because he still has to wear the cone of shame. He eventually lost it completely. When I tried to help him by picking it up, he bit my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 196

By Z3R0G5 - 06/01/2014 23:00 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 177

You deserved it 19 258

GoogieWithers 22

Monday 6 March 2017 3:20

Dogs are silly, he may have heard you saying it was an Apple?

extremereviews 26

Monday 6 March 2017 3:04

That bitch

Comments

TADspace 30

Monday 6 March 2017 2:26

Well that's a dog gone shame.

ElusiveMee 6

Monday 6 March 2017 2:28

Son of a female dog.

extremereviews 26

Monday 6 March 2017 3:04

That bitch

GoogieWithers 22

Monday 6 March 2017 3:20

Dogs are silly, he may have heard you saying it was an Apple?

darshini_ii 24

Monday 6 March 2017 4:09

Did your phone survive? A cat seems to be able to crack a screen with a sneeze. What super power does this pupper have?

Galym3d3 18

Monday 6 March 2017 10:52

Yes, the blank white screen is hilarious!

Alan 54

Monday 6 March 2017 16:00

Update your app :)

LyricaSilvan 29

Monday 6 March 2017 18:48

I have the updated version and it still isn't showing anything. The site's broken.

maritime1992 5

Monday 6 March 2017 12:06

This would be a good time to use his body as a kickball.

jbuckets_404 38

Monday 6 March 2017 12:48

OP: Been there, too.... :-(

young_stud 14

Monday 6 March 2017 16:18

We should be careful with leaving nice things around pets. I learned this from owning a cat and I imagine it would be the same with dogs.

whydiditdothat 12

Tuesday 7 March 2017 1:51

This would be the reason you don't leave nice things where pets can reach.

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Facebook AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Education Students Relatable Technology Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, I was been accused of stealing lunches from the fridge at work. I’m a huge germaphobe and would NEVER eat someone else’s food, but because I’m the fattest one in the office, everyone automatically blamed me. Hashtag fatgirlproblems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 155

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 079

You deserved it 410

The Top

Today, man do I feel old. For the first time ever, a teen thug with more acne spots than brain cells told me to, “Piss off grandad.” Grandad? Guess I look older than I feel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 93

Today, I forgot to take a certain medication that helps turn my lead logs into flaky floaters. So what happens? I'm in the restroom for 30 minutes, straining to go, and two girls walk in and start imitating me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 891

You deserved it 4 961

Today, I didn't have any money to buy a tampon from the dispenser at my school but my hands are small enough so I can just slide them up and grab one. My hand got stuck in the dispenser and my school had to call the fire department. Now everyone calls me "Tampon Girl." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 962

You deserved it 69 861

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 279

Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 639

You deserved it 2 338

Today, I didn’t get much done because I woke up late and therefore didn’t have much time. No wait, that was yesterday. Today I didn’t get much done because I woke up EARLY and was miserably tired and good for nothing all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 778

You deserved it 416

Same thing different taste

Argument ender

Ungrateful doggo

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