Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, my 16 year old daughter convinced her little sister that I am a robot. Now every time I try to talk to her she starts crying. FML
Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML
Today, my daughter spent three hours crying and having a temper tantrum over being forced to have a bath after four days without one. My daughter is 16. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, I had to pick my daughter up from pre-school because she repeatedly hit another kid with a stick. Apparently, my parents have been letting her watch violent action movies again. FML
Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML
Today, my girlfriend got into a huge fight with her mom over the phone. After the fight, she looked ready to cry so I went over to comfort her. She went straight past me, and started confiding in her creepy, extremely expensive dolls instead. FML
Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Tell her that her imaginary brother punched her imaginary boyfriend in the nuts for being such a dick to her, and that he is ready to apologize to her, even though he is not able to give her imaginary make-up sex until the swelling in his imaginary testicles goes down. It's good to have an imaginary brother who'll fight for her -- it might protect her virtuaginity.
spikey818 9
tell her to imagine a better boyfriend
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Comments (80)
Zebidee 9
I beg to differ on the 'I raised this child' bit. Apparently you didn't.
x3herox3 0
Lmao
Peytonlikesme 0
Get her s bf dumbas*
brianjman14 23
Get her some friends. I know, "16 year olds shouldn't have mommy set up play-dates," but seriously... get her some REAL friends. Maybe a boyfriend while you're at it.
yummycupcakegirl 0
wait til the imaginary baby comes...
SwiftKick2DA 0
maybe you shouldn't let TV raise your child, douche.
Doortje 30
Wow, you did a fine job raising her :) Oh, wait. Wrong FML, my bad.
MrPhucked 0
then let her have sex and she'll move on from imaginary boyfriends
saladgirl123 0
f.a.s?
DaviiC 0
Wonder what her childhood was like.......