Kids: Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother...

By Alex - 20/06/2014 22:05 - United Kingdom - Greenford

Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML

agreeclassic 46 465

vote type 1 4 169

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By Anonymous - 21/03/2014 22:35 - Australia

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Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML

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By Damn - 26/06/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out my dad goes to therapy. Confused, I asked him what was going on. He said, "You" without any hesitation. I don't know if he's joking or not. If he is, I don't find that very funny. If he's not, I don't even know what I've done. FML

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By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 02:45 - United States

Today, feeling melancholic, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML

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By not gay in AL - 11/05/2014 17:57 - United States

Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I loved him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML

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EverestMelting 23

Saturday 21 June 2014 5:38

Your parents seem really open minded. Your dad seems funny as well. Just be happy you're alive!

damn_all 22

Saturday 21 June 2014 5:36

Well hopefully it had no consequences for you.

Comments

PapaSmash 14

Sunday 22 June 2014 2:49

Should've said "thought the few things were just genetically handed down by you dad!" Pat him on the back put aviators on and walk out.

gallowsway92 1

Sunday 22 June 2014 23:10

Oh you too my parents had acid

Awnonymous 4

Wednesday 16 July 2014 15:15

LSD is harmless. Look it up.

Exodiafinder687 58

Saturday 21 March 2015 9:40

I'm going to make my wife drink tea when she is pregnant so that when our baby is born he will have a British accent.

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Today, I awoke in my bathtub, water all over the floor, all the way into my living room. I drank too much so I don't remember getting into the bath, I have no clue how long I was in there, and I got a message from the manager of my apartment complex telling me the water had leaked into the apartment below. FML

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Today, thanks to 10 months of lockdown, the most intimate thing I have done on a Saturday night during this time is use a hobby knife to cut 1/4" thick calluses off my feet. I don't even walk anywhere. FML

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