Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, I went to a function with my dad for a football team. Handing my dad the camera, I finally worked up the courage to ask for a photo with my favourite player. The guy was looking at my boobs in all three photo attempts. FML
Today, I was pouring my heart out to my dad about how I'm such a loser and how I have no friends. He listened sympathetically, until his phone buzzed with a text message. He said, "Balls, the guys from work wanna get shitfaced!" and took a rain check on me. FML
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Today, I decided to dress up a little to go out to the bar. I put on a nice shirt, some leggings, and heels. When I walked out the door, my dad said that I looked like a whore. When I got to my boyfriend's house I told him what my dad had said and he replied, "I'd have to agree with him." FML
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML
Today, my dad walked in to the arena where I was watching a hockey game with my boyfriend and his friends. My dad was wearing a crazy grey mohawk wig/hat. Meanwhile, my boyfriend just finished telling me how embarassing it would be to be that guy's kid. FML
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Top comments
Fx13mz 7
So go ahead and do it already. He said it's okay.
allinicolesmh 0
*Dad watching lfl* "That's my girl, I raised her good!"
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Comments (147)
shortperson247 4
You gotta love virginians ;)
tappm98 22
ok this a bit creepy but atleast this means your probably hot(:
Zaffro 8
Seen as the concept of banter doesn't feature in America he's just proud of your body, curves and er other features...
perdix 31
And did they discuss what position they'd like to see you in? I'll bet some would like you to be a wide receiver, while others think of you as a tight end.
ikickgingers 15
Oh sweet lord. I just threw up in my mouth.
immortal628 20
That's unbelievable...... There's a lingerie football league?! Thats great!
thatonekid8027 3
it is lol
lolnatalyloves 9
Ewww
perdix 31
Kids, today!!!! They are so spoiled and soft! I can't get my kid to take out the garbage, let alone play football! When I was a kid, after school I'd go mine coal or clean the city's septic system. And when my mom's drunk friends wanted me and some neighbor boys to oil up and play gladiator games, we didn't like it, but we damn sure did it! Harumph!
perdix 31
I'm actually a wonderful father and my daughter is turning out to be a fine young lady. Keep in mind that perdix is just the character I play on FML, and is not the real me.
Legendslayer222 26
@96: You spoiled the illusion! D:
HappyPickles 11
There's Lingerie Football?!? ... Awesome!! Although, I don't see much difference between what they wear and what the cheerleaders in the regular league wear. ... Would you all be saying it's creepy if her father gave her permission to be a cheerleader??
njgohard 16
Yeah...it's epic.
HumanWiki 8
I know a girl that has said the same.... Maybe you are her..
meintx 9
Time to lock your bedroom door and wear a burka at home. Lol. Drunk ppl say the darnedest things. Lol