Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, I went to a function with my dad for a football team. Handing my dad the camera, I finally worked up the courage to ask for a photo with my favourite player. The guy was looking at my boobs in all three photo attempts. FML
Today, I was pouring my heart out to my dad about how I'm such a loser and how I have no friends. He listened sympathetically, until his phone buzzed with a text message. He said, "Balls, the guys from work wanna get shitfaced!" and took a rain check on me. FML
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Today, I decided to dress up a little to go out to the bar. I put on a nice shirt, some leggings, and heels. When I walked out the door, my dad said that I looked like a whore. When I got to my boyfriend's house I told him what my dad had said and he replied, "I'd have to agree with him." FML
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML
Today, my dad walked in to the arena where I was watching a hockey game with my boyfriend and his friends. My dad was wearing a crazy grey mohawk wig/hat. Meanwhile, my boyfriend just finished telling me how embarassing it would be to be that guy's kid. FML
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Top comments
Fx13mz 7
So go ahead and do it already. He said it's okay.
allinicolesmh 0
*Dad watching lfl* "That's my girl, I raised her good!"
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Comments (147)
lionlvr 9
OMG that is freaking hilarious. I can totally picture what you just said happening.
ndhin831 2
we should really insist on a pic of OP before passing judgement on dad
RedPirate 3
Oh, Virginia. It all makes sense now.
good41thing198 7
Could have been worse. But you should lock your bedroom door at night. And keep some pepper spray handy.
onefinemess 11
Did you ever want to join or was he just trying to help his drunken buddies?
cleolappost 0
ewwwwe!!!
katkev 5
Creeper dad!
bizarre_ftw 22
Keep your door locked at night
bizarre_ftw 22
Good advice
wriptidez 0
sad