Today, my dad got me one of those word locks for my gym locker, for which the password had to be a four-letter word instead of numbers. My dad chose the combo for me. It was "diet". FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I took a picture of the combination to my new lock so I would always have it on my phone if I ever forgot it. I put my phone in my gym locker, locked it with the new lock, then promptly forgot the combination. FML
Today, after getting home from the supermarket, I went to unlock the door so my dad could carry the groceries in. No matter how hard or how many different ways I tried, the lock wouldn't shift. My dad eventually grabbed the keys, twisted once, and after the door unlocked, called me an idiot. FML
Today, I decided to finally use the gym membership I got a few weeks ago. After I returned to the locker room, the locker I used was opened with all my stuff, including my iTouch, cell phone, and my wallet with cash stolen. It turns out I left the sticker that tells you your combo on my new lock. FML
Today, I went to the gym and got locked in the locker room. I had to call the gym's phone number to get them to come let me out, after being in there for half an hour. FML
Today, in the locker room at work, someone tried writing "douche bag" on my locker, and misspelled it four times before apparently giving up. FML
Today, I found out that the daily "vitamins" that my dad has been giving me for the last three months were actually weight loss pills. FML
Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML
Today, the school called my dad telling him they want to put me on a diet, because they're worried about my weight. FML
Today, I told my husband that we should write down all our passwords so we don't forget them. Later, after he'd left, I pulled out his password sheet to do a little snooping, only to learn that he'd written them in some sort of bizarre cipher. What's he hiding? FML
Today, some asshat thought it would be funny to put a second lock on my locker. FML
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Top comments
emmingle 24
I have one of those. Mine is "****", though.
Sandsh8rk 36
Nice observation there, Captain Obvious.
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Comments (74)
reaxion 25
Think yourself lucky it wasn't a lock with built-in scales, where you had to lose a stone to unlock it.
Jarl_the_Elite 27
Better than somethings but not the best
sanecatlady 13
That's one four-letter word I never want to hear ever again, especially from my mother.
Maggie_K 9
I'm sure you can change it though.
mattorama 15
If your own dad has to tell you to lose some weight, maybe you should take the hint.
rdenkewicz 11
...So buy yourself a new lock or don't use the one he gave you.
holliepong 8
be confident about yourself, you're beautiful;)
puppie406 23
Buy him one too and make '****' the combo. Because he's obviously a huge ****.
airportlad 4
Its just motivation
rachilio 26
My friend and I share a band locker and we have one of these- our combination is the simple but effective- LOCK