Today, my dad decided to have a little father and daughter bonding time. Unfortunately, his idea of bonding involves him sitting around at home, getting piss drunk, and falling asleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to visit my dad. I haven't seen him in a while so I wanted to give him another chance to be an actual dad to me. Apparently, getting drunk and getting it on with his girlfriend while I was there was more important than spending time with his daughter, who he hasn't seen in almost a year. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML
Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, my father got drunk and became crazy. He just kept talking nonsense and swaying while walking. It seemed like he was going to vomit. I hate him being like this. FML
Today, in the midst of his ongoing mid-life crisis, my dad forced me to accompany him for some father-son bonding. The bonding involved me driving us away at high speed after he gleefully hurled a bucket of paint all over a store window. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, my father got out of rehab for his alcoholism. This would be great if he hadn't started drinking the moment he got home. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DocBastard 40
Better than father and daughter bondage time, I suppose.
A7X_LoVeee 10
Sounds like a good time. At least he didn't call you hot.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (132)
bryanorange 3
¡Boner Fail! JaJaJaJaJaJaJa
hcovballer247 0
Sounds pretty fun to me..
LemonStarship 5
Father of the year right there.
Oster_fml 0
grab the rest if the beer make party and get blastered
NCR 0
such a fail it's a win
irforever 0
would u rather him take u out somewhere and have awkward conversations?!! I don't think soo...
Uncle_Moe_Lester 3
my dad is like that too. last time I seen him was 3 years ago on my birthday and he didn't have enough money for his booze so I ended up paying and didn't even get me a birthday card.
jazzy514 7
wtf does piss drunk mean
goza27 0
just an expression. however I'm sure it derived from someone getting so drunk they actually piss themselves.
b1ondiee 0
ahaah that happens to me all the time :P
MackofSimi 0
what's the problem there ???