Today, my co-worker threw a rubber mallet at my face, and I broke my finger in the process of saving my face. She then told me to "take it up with HR, bitch". She's the HR manager. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my coworker got angry at a mean customer. She came to the back where I work and started punching the wall repeatedly. When I tried to intervene and stop her from breaking her hand, she punched me in the stomach and uppercut me. FML
Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female employee at the office. A little later, I managed to hit her in the face with a door, giving her a bruise. Nobody believes it was an accident. FML
Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Today, after a badly misjudged hand signal, I accidentally hit my boss in the face instead of high-fiving her. FML
Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML
Today, my psycho boss snatched a file from my hand so aggressively that I got a papercut. She then scolded me for bleeding on the papers. FML
Today, at work I was talking to a co-worker about what a slacker my manager was, and how all she did was stand around and talk. She was standing behind me the whole time. I now have sore nuts due to a direct hit from a broom handle. FML
Today, I finally worked up the nerve to quit my job after being tortured by my boss for months. My boss responded by throwing a hardcover textbook at me and hitting me in the face. FML
Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
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Top comments
olpally 33
Talk to another manager who isn't a bitch like her. That's ****** up. She should be fired for that.
cjlerch 29
I'm pretty sure that's assault. If you report that, she'll almost certainly be fired.
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Comments (85)
oJoy 11
call police, report her for assault and go higher up. good luck
tylerwl93 5
is your manager Pam Poovey?
painlessmind 11
Sue
TMramrod 15
Oh man she can get in so much trouble for that it's making me laugh lol
JoshMohawk 11
Sounds like an assault issue for the police to handle. In case you weren't sure, local law enforcement outranks the HR department.
capnbzarr 43
**** that, take it to the police.
skyeyez9 25
Call the police on that bitch and file assault charges.
unforgiven1993 7
lawsuit maybe???
ShenaniganNinja 20
Yeah. That's assault. Call the cops. If there's any other witnesses get them on board. She'll definitely be fired and likely arrested. When she freaks out tell her "take it up with my lawyer, bitch"
yellowzinnias 20
Go over her head, and then contact the police and your labor union, as well.