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Add a comment - Reply to : #
That's horrible of him. I'm not saying you should dump him, but this is one case where you should consider it.
Maybe he didn't like your father much, or had something very important to do?
My husband's cousin died and we hated each other. I still went to the funeral because I knew she was important to my husband and he was really upset and I love him and wanted to be there for him. That being said he's only her boyfriend and we don't know how long they've been together so it doesn't make him a bad person just because he wouldn't go. There could be a good reason why. If her dad didn't like him maybe he would feel uncomfortable about being there cause he feels like her dad wouldn't want him there and that people might be mean to him. I got plenty of dirty looks at the funeral I went to with my husband cause a few people knew we hated each other. He might just be scared to cause waves.
or maybe he has a hard time dealing with his emotions in situations like that. could be a million reasons why he didn't go buy you'll never know until you talk with him OP.
That's something to discuss before the actual event. From the FML we're really not sure when the boyfriend told OP. Although, if my boyfriend didn't go to a funeral in my family and his only excuse was "work", as this FML implies, that would not fly with me at all.
I find funerals horribly awkward. When I go I get bitched at for "not caring blah blah blah" since I don't show emotions. They think I'm some horrible person for not being emotional. Then when I don't go I'm bitched at for not caring. I find its just easier to not go and then I can ignore their phone calls and prevent a scene from happening.
maybe your boyfriend is not ready to accept your father has died, and he wants to process it in own personnel manner. or maybe he was afraid he would have an emotional breakdown during the funeral and he doesn't want you to see him like that. the fact that he made up a bullshit excuse does not mean he hates her dad.
I get that you're thinking of her boyfriend and his feelings but she's the one that lost her father, not the other way around. I eventually forgave my bestfriend for not being there when my father passed away, but I truly haven't forgotten it. My friend explained and said it was hard for her to deal with death but imagine how harder it is to deal with a loss like that without support.