sexual parrot
🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend's parents' parrot won't stop imitating my sex moans, and keeps doing it whenever I speak. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Moanie
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Hush!
Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML
Anonymous
Enjoy the sirens
Today, my parrot learned how to imitate my baby's crying. Now, every time the baby cries, the parrot joins in, and it sounds like a chorus of screaming. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, her pet bird whistled a tune she'd been trying to teach it. She stopped and congratulated it, and I took the chance to move it to the other room to prevent further distraction. She got mad and wouldn't let me back in bed because I just "untrained it." FML
Anonymous
Munich, Germany
Today, I have to look after my best friend's parrot for a few days. One minute out of the room, I came back in to find out that the parrot had taught my three-year-old the word "slut". Now the two won't stop screaming "slut" throughout the whole house. My wife thinks both learned the word from me. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Noise annoys
Today, I told my boyfriend he is good at singing. Now he won't stop. FML
facepalm
Gainesville, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML
NestHead
Moscow, Russian Federation
Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML
weep weep weep
United States
Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML
whoawhoawhoa
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Top comments
Coryj1220 15
Quit doing it with the parrot in the room, or don't be so damn loud.
dimerneckel 22
Start making other noises when it tries to speak! That'll show that pesky parrot.
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Comments (97)
weveallbeenthere 30
Forest Gump did that too. hahahaha, YDI.
Drag0nb0rn 22
HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE
Bentonic 11
EH HE HE HE HE HE HE HEH
darwinism 30
Sex and parrots never ends well!
IvyOswin 17
Polly want a penis?
Eyeslick 33
Especially when it's with a parrot!
gracehi 33
Are you sure it's a parrot and not a troll? Perhaps you should banish him to live under the bridge.
alfalfalaffa 17
Hey he's just exited he might get to witness a little more action!
SunTzu2 9
She says she's having sex with the parrot at her boyfriends house! He's not a witness
DeadPixel4 29
Try to teach him something else? A moaning parrot can get quite annoying...
silvius 6
you are being trolled by a parrot hahaha im so sorry but if u cant find humor in this then you must be cold.
KingLewisII 34
I think Polly wants a cracker
oddities 20
I was thinking Polly wants a bone. I'm sorry, that was terrible and I will never make that joke again. I'm just exhausted and my joke taste is terrible now so I shall get coffee to see if I'm wittier in a few minutes. IGNORE ME!
Ducklett 11
Maybe it's time to quieten down in the bedroom or train the parrot, whichever is easiest. Hopefully tell make a funny story with the parents!
whirlednews 8
Polly wants the cookie.
siqdawg 9
LOL!