sexual parrot
🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend's parents' parrot won't stop imitating my sex moans, and keeps doing it whenever I speak. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Moanie
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Hush!
Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML
Anonymous
Enjoy the sirens
Today, my parrot learned how to imitate my baby's crying. Now, every time the baby cries, the parrot joins in, and it sounds like a chorus of screaming. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, her pet bird whistled a tune she'd been trying to teach it. She stopped and congratulated it, and I took the chance to move it to the other room to prevent further distraction. She got mad and wouldn't let me back in bed because I just "untrained it." FML
Anonymous
Munich, Germany
Today, I have to look after my best friend's parrot for a few days. One minute out of the room, I came back in to find out that the parrot had taught my three-year-old the word "slut". Now the two won't stop screaming "slut" throughout the whole house. My wife thinks both learned the word from me. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Noise annoys
Today, I told my boyfriend he is good at singing. Now he won't stop. FML
facepalm
Gainesville, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML
NestHead
Moscow, Russian Federation
Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML
weep weep weep
United States
Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML
whoawhoawhoa
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Top comments
Coryj1220 15
Quit doing it with the parrot in the room, or don't be so damn loud.
dimerneckel 22
Start making other noises when it tries to speak! That'll show that pesky parrot.
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Comments (97)
ahh_rats 15
That's awesome
neroccaesar 10
Exactly what I was going to say
worldclassrager 41
Well then I would only you would know the noises if anyone else hears them...
ahippienamedrae 10
It's a parrot... you kind of have to expect things like that. The next couple times you're in bed, yell something really off the wall like, "I WILL EAT YOUR SOUL FOR THE GLORY OF SATAN". that'll teach that damn bird who's boss
carbonbasedcynic 17
parrots are the funniest creatures alive
VancouverGuy89 9
Best parrot ever
neroccaesar 10
Whenever I try to do something private with anyone the cat comes and sits on my face.
Axel5238 29
Unless the parrot is in his room, YDI. Why would you do it where the parrot could hear you? Also if it isn't in his room like say in the living room. Not only does the parrot hear you, the boyfriend's parents could walk in on you.
deedee9867 8
lol
youku337 5
Hmm maybe you should say "yank it hard" in front of the parrot that way the parents dont know its you.
FlyingPie 17
That's a shitty situation.