Today, my boyfriend picked his nose and tried to stick his booger up my nose, claiming that it was time to plant his "seed." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick his nose for him. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
Today, I saw my 32-year-old boyfriend of 4 years pick his nose and eat it. The booger in question was attached to his nose and he sucked it out spaghetti-style. He then tried to kiss me. I still feel my stomach churning. FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend began to stroke my nose. "You can pick your girlfriend, but you can't pick your girlfriend's nose," I said playfully. In response, he shouted, "Yes, I can!" before painfully jamming his pinky up my left nostril. FML
Today, when my boyfriend came to bed, I rolled over and watched as he used his pinky to clean out both nostrils, then eat it what he found. He’s almost 25. FML
Today, my boyfriend was laying down on top of me and he was looking at me with passion in his eyes. I thought he was finally going to tell me that he loved me. Instead, he said, "You have a booger." FML
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Top comments
jebron 13
Ah, kindergarten relationship problems
MetallicSkeleton 12
That was snot very expected
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Comments (90)
GoogieWithers 24
I may have threw up a little when I read this.
lilbird187 9
I seriously laughed so hard at this. I don't know why but I did
Xaelo 11
What the **** is wrong with your boyfriend?
Pandistoteles 16
What the actual f... How common are things like this? XD
saidaswear 20
"Stay calm, I am do the sex."
nemouisu 22
And that, kids, is how babies are born
EmeraldArcher 10
this reminds me of another FML... "This shall soon be plump with my seed."
YourGrammarSucks 12
I see three reasons why you should break up with him immediately. Also, three reasons why I should not eat and read FMLs at the same time.
edmunson 22
And, remind him, per the quote, "that's not how ANY of this works"!
Cristian151 12
Is that what he considers romantic