Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I bought my crush a bouquet of roses plus one fake. The line was going to be, "I'll stop loving you when the last rose dies." I told my best friend and he thought it was such an amazing idea that he stole the fake rose and gave it to her himself. Guess who got the girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML
Empathy
Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML
Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read, "It's over." FML
Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML
So brave…
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
Mixed signals
Today, my boyfriend surprised me with a bouquet of flowers he'd picked himself. This would’ve been romantic, had they not all been Poison Hemlock. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML
Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine, except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML
Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML
Top comments
Shelbyyyyyyy 4
At least you got roses.
bbedlock_fml 7
That's an, um, creative way to break up with someone.
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Comments (123)
Furrywhiplash 14
I think the creativity of a break up should be measured by the seriousness of the relationship. If it was just a summer fling, then have a blast, make a good story out of it. If they had been planning on getting married, then that definitely needs to be serious and respectful.
shad0w1 1
Well make it all count everyday buy something more expensive and have him pAy for it, say to him you should of bought a fake one would of been cheaper.
pfclunchbox005 1
Hahahaa sounds like me! I'd do that for my own personal humor. .
kaldazaba 1
turn em upside down n they last longer n make em wiat longer, though id prob stomp em at their feet n say now u dont have 2 wait, GOOD-BYE!
Track1991 0
What a dick!
lolyeahthatsme 11
He loves you not.
BloodFaerie 21
what.an.ass
C130chief 0
Hahahahahaha!!!!
scorpiella 4
You should've said "I'll save you the wait" and taken a lighter to the bouquet.
pandapoof42 3
Uhmm... Wow that isn't just a Facebook like. I'm afraid that didn't actually come from Facebook.